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Jul 2020 · 40
Hunger
Ron Jul 2020
I’ve just held you up to offer my hand,
And cannot help my weeping to see you wander.
Even leftovers leave to appease the nights hunger.
I will await your return with empty stomach.
Jul 2020 · 37
The Farmer
Ron Jul 2020
The grinding of the grain,
An intoxicating hum.
Hay bales piled high,
prickly building blocks.
We harvest as farmers,
and are self-sufficient,
Knowing the weather,
Of tomorrow will come.
Only after he ‘d stolen leisure,
From work on the farm,
Did he realize how long,
the summer days had become.
Among fresh cut wheat,
Standing there in the eve,
a cool breeze on his face,
Leftovers from the day,
To appease the nights fate.
Time to eat dinner,
And sleep.
Jul 2020 · 42
Death of a Daisy
Ron Jul 2020
Time travels deep amidst you earthly lot,
Are you yet so earthly to be tranquil and free,
From the madding crowds thronging the streets?
What's that?
Your ethereal existence transcends the worldly?
I spot a child picking daisies beyond the roadside edge,
Looking up, perchance she caught sight of me.
Behold the beauty of her daisy’s death,
There is much truth in her reality,
And yet still, I find no better words to explain it.
Then tranquil, earthly and free.
Jul 2020 · 37
Sojourn
Ron Jul 2020
Once a small child now an old man.
White hairs to match the child’s down.
Easy the heart gets hurt by life.
Slowly now the urge to move,
Beyond the closing doors,
Where then all craving ends.
Jul 2020 · 25
Tracing Time
Ron Jul 2020
Without a sound
The moon arcs high
a cratered orb tracking time.
It slips beyond my quixotic experience
beyond the reach of my rational hands.
Pale and round the silent drum,
glistens speckled silver-bright.
The night cats howl, the winds lash out,
blowing and tossing life’s pages about,
There for an intellectual moon’s delight,
New pages that need to be learned.
Lyrics of a song, fragments of a tune
Searching for and nearly found.
Looking for one more story to tell,
The moon arcs high
Without a sound.
Jul 2020 · 39
Regret
Ron Jul 2020
Regret has no business interfering with a person's life,
as if one could change the past by spending the future dwelling on it.
Were it not for regret,
the present might be a much more pleasant place to live,
allowing one to look forward to the future with optimism,
rather than hesitation.
Regret is useless to all but the person using it and deserving or not,
is nothing more than the disguised past tense of guilt.
Regret is a selfish act.
Jul 2020 · 39
Half Baked
Ron Jul 2020
After allowing my love to leave me
Because of my own stupid absurdity
I baked myself a humble loaf
A reminder of my missing hope
I then allowed it to sit
So daily it would startle me
Until I vowed to make it quite
So with treacherous trembling knife
I stabbed its crusty hide
And on insertion deep inside
Softly something crumbled
Sadly something died.
Jul 2020 · 32
Old Clothes
Ron Jul 2020
These jeans, this shirt,
What must they think of me,
With all my windy farts and tears.
Both jeans and shirt, how old they grow,
Bearing the weight of my aging years.

Yes, they’ve seen my lonely days,
while these jeans, this shirt,
Their color fades.
And yes, they’ve seen the subtle change,
Of my once brown hair now turning grey.

These jeans worked hard,
Through cold and fear,
Protecting both my front and rear.
Now do they seek a warmer place,
To help old feet keep up the pace?

This shirt a warm but humble cloth,
Absorbing years of stains and sweat,
Never one to disagree.
Yet in its secret knowing warmth,
My youthful arrogance it has kept.

This threadbare shirt, these faded jeans,
So many tender passions,
And lonely sorrows have they seen.
They have no feelings I am told,
Still,
Where will they go when I am old?
Jul 2020 · 96
My Shadow
Ron Jul 2020
My shadow has gone up the mountain.
Shall I accompany him?
The day is closing, I close my gate.
As the autumn winds rattle my fate.
When early next spring
the brown grass turns green,
Will my shadow return to me?
Jul 2020 · 28
Morning Epiphany
Ron Jul 2020
Doe eyes closed and lashes lovely
with parted lips you lay,
Darkened waves on white pillows
spread your unbound hair,
Awake, I watched your sleeping face
Finding perfect beauty in the slow breaking day.
And then I knew that love had passed my way.
As the soft morning glow shown on your face
Within its light I saw your true grace
that beneath my fingertips touched.
Then came that glorious music in my heart,
And I wept that this love,
Had been granted to one such as I.
This love that gave her heart and soul to me.
And she while radiant in the early outburst of dawn,
Slept on, as a breeze swept through the room
With the smell of green June,
And I imagined flowers for her hair.
Jul 2020 · 42
Forgotten Blooms
Ron Jul 2020
I saw a blood red paper flower today,
barely nourished by a forgotten stain,
it’s leaves blackened in shadow.
Too much neglect will do that,
slow the sap’s passage,
blacken the leaves,
dry the green to gray,
and the heart.
It may have been saved,
If only someone had listened.
But nobody I told believed,
in its odd color or scent,
or the way its leaves grew,
in fragrant splayed rows,
down the entire length of the page.
In fact, the very page itself,
smelled faintly of spilled red wine,
dark chocolate, and treachery.
And something else,
something hard to describe,
the mustiness of the sea,
on a foggy day perhaps?
The odor of truth it was,
Wilted words in shades of red
so familiar,
yet so strangely new.
Words you could have almost,
wrote yourself,
if only in your dreams,
there had been a pencil,
a pen, or even a paintbrush,
a thought presented paper thin,
If only there had ever really been,
a flower to see.
Jul 2020 · 24
Standing Still
Ron Jul 2020
Rain gone now.
Earth a wet void.
Warm night air,  
A fine summer show.
Bright moon,
Shines in my eyes.
Dreams, clear streams,
falling on stones.
Faint clouds roar,
"Who now heads home?"
The trees then answer,
"Who wants to know?"
Scenes of summer
Will never stay.
But I,
I will always remain.
Jul 2020 · 25
Still Not Immortal
Ron Jul 2020
Many years in this world,
And I am not yet immortal.
Wandering through,
A thousand lives,
of sun-kissed lands,
Deep dark rivers,
Of opaque glass,
Tall grass so green,
it hurts your eyes.
Borderlands, flatlands,
where dust devils thrive.
Tasted time, sipped on wine,
still not immortal.
Loved cooks, changed looks,  
inserted myself into history books.
(at least I tried)
Now here I am yet still alive,
Head in the clouds,
to view my skies,
Nope,
Still not immortal.
Jul 2020 · 57
Huffing Jasmine
Ron Jul 2020
It is a promise unfulfilled,
To which now I humbly view,
The rugged climbing jasmine vine,
Relies daily on the dew.

No doubt this inconstancy,
May be difficult to find,
So tangled are my morning thoughts,
As the jasmine’s skyward climb.
Jul 2020 · 23
The Carpenter
Ron Jul 2020
And eighty years
passed among mortals.
With pieces of life,
being laid on the board,
The carpenter takes,
his hammer home.
The work of the handle,
Grown tired and thin,
Hands of flesh,
Now turned to stone,
What he has created,
In this life he lived,
Has left him immortal.
Jul 2020 · 25
Impromptu Companionship
Ron Jul 2020
beneath the liquid ripple
of water passing endless
pleasant over pebbles
I stop to listen to the stream
and fleeting as the breeze
my thoughts were lost
amongst my ease
now only the gray-faced moon
does sojourn at my sleeve
Jul 2020 · 45
Empathetic Rest
Ron Jul 2020
Those days long gone,
Of my life’s living empathy
are like tranquil pools,
clear liquid jewels,
in a forest green where,
my shadow haunted dips his hand,
and cools his fevered head.
As too, the warm moist air,
Comes blowing softly,
upon his heaving breast,
Hinting but lightly,
at the sacred mystery of rest.
Jul 2020 · 49
Outside of Me
Ron Jul 2020
My evenings umbra
stood watching
The nights damp
sweet falling
breathing lone sighs
and calling
the sky's departure
of dew.
Diluting loose tears,
in a fountain
of fears
where my fate
spread supine
in a cascade
of time
to ponder my present
tableau.
Jul 2020 · 31
Still There
Ron Jul 2020
You are not forgotten
though,
my thoughts are bare *****
hollow
like small veins of dried flowers
pressed
between pages of a book
coaxed
at times by tender thoughts
forward
To recall your lovely form
Waiting
Folded open in my mind
Jul 2020 · 33
Running the Right Way
Ron Jul 2020
You want to run you say? But where shall you go?
City concrete has no need to follow, it is already there.
Steel beams do not see, and do not breathe
That most pungent stench of human misery.
They will not care, it does not matter,
Run, flee, get out before you’re seen!
Listen close you’ll hear it everywhere,
The meter maid, the bus driver, the newsvendor
All waving goodbye, urging you to go
Farewell to you they say,
So long until another day!
Go! Why is it still you waver?
Are you not puzzled to remain?
With feet laced neat in in running shoes,
You could run fast along these jaded lanes.
Pack your clothes, leave behind your ruined lives,
Translate your unknown language at another time.
Midnight street lights will not save you,
There are no hallowed halls in downtown stalls.
Do not become a future myth to bleed,
You are human, why pretend? Go!
Find your home in future seas, lift your chin,
Live unburdened, love again.
Jul 2020 · 51
Ambience
Ron Jul 2020
slender clouds.
smell of light rain
midday sun is hiding again.
within this liquid luminosity
I only just notice my clothes
are somehow soaked in color.
Jul 2020 · 46
Apathy
Ron Jul 2020
Little by little
I feel languid with life.
Who pities the vigor that withers?
Only the image in my mirror
Joins me in tears.
Jul 2020 · 35
Old Bones
Ron Jul 2020
There was a sharp crack
in my ecstasy;
it split a weathered rock
with a shameless fire.
Then sometime later,
A carnivore left,
my splintered bones there,
in that divided space,
And then ran off uneasy
to a hidden sanctuary.
I knew I would bleed,
but there you were,
surrounding me.
With your slanting sun
shining in, and I loved you,
I loved you again and again
Bring it along
in crushing jaws
with golden clause
and breathy pause,
Such pun intended,
my carnivorous bone-bringer,
I’d welcome the pain
All over again.
Jul 2020 · 33
Rare
Ron Jul 2020
What pleasure it is,
For rain on my skin,
to dry in the bright sunshine!
Jul 2020 · 104
I Did
Ron Jul 2020
I died
with a smile
when she left me
there alone
standing on rain darkened stone

I longed
for my shadow
to stretch
from my brain
to my tired and platonic bones

My lids
half closed
Ceilings of my soul
There I stood
Blood coursing in veins all aglow

My shape
Vile, viscous
Tears run sour
cried over
by none but the dark earth below

I mourned
broken windows
through which
droplets of light
displayed my infinite carbon-based life

But… I loved
And so I perished with a smile that night.
Jul 2020 · 33
Transendence
Ron Jul 2020
It sloughs my skin,
that unknown distance
it takes to reach
my end in sleep.
Your closed eyes
and carmine lips
formed into a smile
a trait that I’d
surrender into
as often as
your smiles endure
my transcendence
of bone and muscle
Jul 2020 · 22
Transition
Ron Jul 2020
Who is to blame,
for my secret disarray,
like many patterns dyed
in summer fields of color?
Not I,
Who hides my grief,
In deeper shades of gray.
Just let the winds of sky
blow shut a cloudy passage,
that I might keep wisely then,
My many shades of sorrow,
behind me for a while.
Jul 2020 · 26
Wine Tasting
Ron Jul 2020
Oh when will it be, oh when will it be,
That she shall come my face to see,
With wine and love and gladness.
Her lips to kiss those lips of mine
Whose lips will taste of wine,
So, I shall sip the music,
from her sweet lips.
And she…
For all
To see,
may taste the love,
and desire from mine.
Jul 2020 · 52
Buddy
Ron Jul 2020
I had a buddy,
My buddy was a toad,
my buddy is flat,
He is flat on the road.
Don't laugh, 1st poem I ever wrote, 6th grade, got an "A".
Jul 2020 · 35
Forecast
Ron Jul 2020
It sparks lightning,
and broadcasts thunder,
Canceling drought,
in the calendar leaves.
It weeps for all the trees that stand
and for all the stones that sit,
Unclothed and dry their open grave
It may give life
but then could drown
my will to live.
I have tried on all the climates
and rain is the one hat
that never seems to fit.
Jul 2020 · 38
Cyclic
Ron Jul 2020
Nightlights, streetlamps,
Convenience store glow,
Lit in a dull meaningless light.
Lives live on another decade or so
The same though, no exit in sight.
Death floats in, begins it all again,
Just as before, all repeats,
Nightlights, streetlamps,
Convenience store glow…
Jul 2020 · 40
Dignity
Ron Jul 2020
Can one be obligated,
for travesties uncommitted?
Can one admire the flower,
rooted deep in the grave,
Despite not causing the death ,
or ever knowing the name?
Proximity erodes,
the benefits of anonymity,
still from their silver cages,
The cowards all scream,
“If I can’t see, then it can’t be.”
I will not kneel,
But stand tall under the feet
Of those on my shoulders.
Jul 2020 · 79
My Now
Ron Jul 2020
I’ve not seen her
for a long time now.
Each day above my dreams
I see us hand in hand.
Memories of painful leavings.
If it feels like this now,
What did it feel like then?
I’m glad my now don’t know.
Jul 2020 · 55
Hard Frost
Ron Jul 2020
Life’s regrets and failures,
Have formed as frost on my forehead.
No longer do I have the body
To take me where my springs have led.
Why then do I need to go?
Jul 2020 · 29
Watercolors
Ron Jul 2020
Unfold this dream
Against the light,
crafted hills and streams
Finely painted nature

Thin clouds, light rain.
Far stars, faint moon.
I sit, I look, the green moss grows
Soon becomes one with my clothes.
Jul 2020 · 41
Growing
Ron Jul 2020
Today I ignored
This stale old world
To better refresh my garden
Jul 2020 · 45
Tenant
Ron Jul 2020
The pale heavens of the universe
refute a good morning to her
neither do the sky-punched stars
bother with an evening’s kiss.
This earth, where so many memories,
Among fine sentiments are buried,
could die in need of tender glance,
A cordial comment, or a little peace.
This damp blue ball is lonely,
so very lonely, as she views
the moon's cold cratered clothing,
while accusing the sun of being a thief.
It is a hot sun burning bright,
with many photons un-leased
in an attempt to pacify this earth
as the only living renter it keeps.
Jul 2020 · 45
Integrity Falls
Ron Jul 2020
There goes that fleeting loyalty
where goes those selfish whims,
Where I the autumn leaves
I would fear most the wind
Jun 2020 · 41
Erudition
Ron Jun 2020
The one whom I thought of as a teacher
Passed deftly like the shade leaving no shadow.
He drank all the inertia, all the lethargy,
And waited himself in vain for fame.
He was his own omen, and the warning,
compassion for all, breathing torment,
Until he endlessly suffocated himself
On the nothing for which he waited.
I have learned well of his teaching,
It has become me.
Jun 2020 · 42
Electric Blue
Ron Jun 2020
There will be thunder,
Cascading in tumultuous waves,
Remember me she says,
As she called for more storms,
This entire world may be the color,
Of my bright electric blue,
And your heart will then turn to fire.

That day as the storms blew in,
A true prophecy was discovered,
When for the last time she said goodbye,
Her lightning soaring through the heavens
Deep sparks flashing in her eyes,
Yet still my burnt heart longed to see,
Her electric blue fire in the sky.
Jun 2020 · 55
Melancholy Eyes
Ron Jun 2020
As when a numbing illness or hard times past do part,
Could it possibly be that a terrified body and mind,
Does envelop in warm thoughts to repose a childhood rhyme?
Will every leaf in the forest, every stone on a path then release,
an unheard lyric to accompany melancholies departing spirit?
Does her prompt arrival with ***** wings and crusty eyes,
In poor days of ill health, low spirits and mournful times,
then bode well for her later departure with joyful cries?
A shy creature then am I, trembling softly from the dusk,
To view calamities past, through melancholies truthful eyes.
Jun 2020 · 52
Life's Flight
Ron Jun 2020
How quiet do I walk among the crowd,
To silence my existence pretension,
and speak of such posterity aloud,
of joyful days, children’s ways,
and tragic plays of passion.
Now peering deeply,
into darkest of night,
I find form in a chaos of feeling,
Dim lit by art’s anemic light,
Enabling a view in the silken silence,
Of my own life’s terminal flight!
Jun 2020 · 35
Saline Streaks
Ron Jun 2020
This remorseless dark separation
I bear unequally with you.
Why cry?
Rather, I search for your hand,
And ask for your promise
to visit me in dream.
You and I are like two seas,
many shores separated,
No more meeting in this world.
If only sometimes through starlight,
You would send me a greeting
through the salty stars,
streaming down my cheeks.
Jun 2020 · 36
Lesser
Ron Jun 2020
I am not inherently anything,
but born as a blank canvas
on which my life’s choices
have been splashed.
I am the writer of the words,
that I reflectively speak,
of the artist of my inborn paths.
My feet leaving prints of life
wherever I’ve stepped,
my words staining the ears,
of many hearts of mediocrity
or all too similar to those of shame.
But still life owns the power
Of my good morning smile
to all those lone wanderers
who would come after me.
Jun 2020 · 25
Untitled
Ron Jun 2020
Please accept my apologies
for pretending to not know you
If I knew you too much
I couldn’t help that either
I cannot accept this choice
in my double-edged world.
Jun 2020 · 35
Only Me
Ron Jun 2020
I am much too alone in this world,
yet not alone enough,
to truly consecrate my hour.
I am much too small in this world,
yet not small enough,
to be only an object, a thought, an action,
or just a simple easy breeze.
I want my free will,
and I want it to accompany,
a path that leads to people;
and though that I want,
during my time begs questions,
where something I thought I made up,
was already there for others to see.
Yet is it enough,
to be so alone in this world?
Is it enough to be only me?
Jun 2020 · 28
Farewell
Ron Jun 2020
Love said farewell to me,
Though not without her tears.
Did she recall the gladness of those years,
We talked together,
With little laughs?
Yes, but no weeping can be done in half,
So sad!
Out from my open door she went,
Her proud soul torn, her breathing spent.
And though I know not where she’s gone,
Her laughter still I hear,
in the beauty of the dawn.
Jun 2020 · 34
Unwound
Ron Jun 2020
In silence I lie alone,
The lights are all out.
Gently I feel through the darkness,
with a need to touch hand to hand,
a desire to feel mouth on mouth.
The night wind moans its lonely sound,
then suddenly I'm awake, aware, afraid,
with only the cold darkness to be found.
Where is your soft hair, your sweet mouth?
These then are my thoughts of you,
In my sleep since you’ve been gone.
And though I lie here now,
Alone, awake and unwound
My love for you still
slumbers on.
Jun 2020 · 34
Small Thoughts
Ron Jun 2020
He sits in their kitchen with mingled aromas,
where creatures arise from coffee mug steam.
He has only his hands to hold up his head,
he came from where small talk,
to large loss has led.

But then, oh so willingly,  
He was trapped among many fine things.
The wind is now searching to trace out a path,
While sunlight glints on a shiny juice glass.
He can see with a twist of a dull butter knife,
the ease of drawing such strawberry blood,
his trembling hands ready to spin a red thread,
on her hot buttered toast, or a bagel instead.
His lips remain silent with thunderous cries,
eyes resting on windows with live oaks outside.

And so she said, “my love”,
“there should be no more to life than just this.”
Watching her hesitate he stirs hot coffee.
Then curls his hands around hers and her mug,
while time ticks through the day just begun.
The fresh morning mist a subtle mosaic,
lit by the sun preserved with such color,
as a new summers leaf,
with a yellow lace flower,
such was their love once discussed.

Once drenched in love,
Soaked softly in sun, this moments relief,
Spins slowly across his kitchen motif,
until a breeze blows in to surround him,
scented words of lost love, a hope yet revived,
in a fragrant unbalanced wisp of his life.
The past cannot die without a death,
If only he could heal her with more coffee,
While patiently he waits,
for other such fools to fall in love.
Jun 2020 · 44
Crying Light
Ron Jun 2020
Last night I could not sleep
Due to the moonlight crying on my bed.
I kept hearing its distant voice calling,
Asking questions of sudden regret
And then quiet out of nowhere,
Nothing nebulous then answered “Yes.”
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