own no cross to drag through the rock,
just sit as a dog and shiver in the dark.

bite your tongue when heavy-hearted,
use the pain to advance some caution.

wild winds tangle thoughts confused,
summers storms blow but seldom sooth.

shiver at birth, a warmth now lost,
silence in sorrow, loss of the spark.

look close now, the ghosts have gathered,
speaking a sodden, vernacular language.

I remember when spring once silenced me,
and summer did boil my blood.
I remember when fall fell scratching,
And winter took hold of my tongue.
I remember when night stood facing me,
Soft praying for the sun to come up.
I remember the dawn of my youth,
Patient I wait for my eve yet to come.

I don't look so ugly now,
since those many worlds have stopped
revolving around me.
Painted only in hues of a colorblind sight,
My colorless life.
Surrounds me.

Rinse your worries,
In the spirit of the rain.
Fling your laughter,
In the face of the sun.
Dance round wildly,
In the yard till I come.
Then kiss me slowly,
Till our hearts become one.

The clock on the wall
Keeps making faces
In an endless teasing
Of my time soon to come

So loud as I shout,
I am not heard.
As much as I sing,
I am not song,
So long as I see,
I am not seen,
sometimes I know,
It is all me,
But most times,
My dull light,
Is too dim to see.

Tell me I am needed,
In your sleep like air.
And not like whispers,
Momentarily there.

Tell me I am seen,
In the orbs of your eyes.
Stare into my face,
Present me no lies.

Tell me I am read,
Between pages of books.
A paragraphs end,
My prologue mistook.

When tired and old,
Lying down in our bed.
Kiss me like I'm young,
And taste what you 've said.

Softly sings
the southern rain,
a silver sheen,
On ivy gleams,
Painted vines,
on a painted wall.
Whispered voices,
crisp with color,
A crimson dusk,
dark curtains fall.

Night parts before me,
my moon of envy,
Along the shores,
Were night birds call.
Shadows laugh,
Just made of mist,
As evening’s breath,
Drifts slowly past,
My window ledge,
I sleep at last.

She: Enticing waters with luminous waves,
         that can tempt the dead from their bed.

I: The sinews of my soul stretching for both,
    Her beauties form from where it is fed.

She: A wondrous storm in a turbulent sea
         that has taken hold of the deepest of me

I: Refusing to slip off to a peaceful sleep
   until her waves of desire sing sweet release.

Wafting away from mouth and lip
Through volumes of mist and fog
My haunting breath floats beyond,
Bearing the scent of my song.
Deep in the city horns linger on corners,
With streetlights then pointing the way.
And the moment of our last meeting?
Will our shadows again ever cross?
Should destiny then ask from where?
We were borne on separate paths,
Simple the reason to vanquish our care.

A shadow from afar,
      in a dark silk suit,
Walking slowly past,
      my cup of noodle soup,
Has brought to me,  
      with a shimmery sound,
The breath of trees,
      and a thousand streams.
I heard him in,
      my sunny breakfast nook,
I traced his path,
      in my steaming tea,
And I fear no change,
      no future needs,
though my restless heart,  
      may one day die,
As my summers chase,
      the cloudless skies.

On alien shores
all waves find end
   Their dying cries
surround me.

In your left hand
the arrow.

In your right hand
the string.

I am wounded.
On my hands and knees
I cross the stream.

This same fast flow
from life let us go.

Every day I wake
Only slowly to swim to shore.

Sudden in their startled flight
Of black birds flocking through
calling in the coming night
Across the moon they flew,
Fat round, silent white.

I want to inhale you like cool moonlight.
Like I would seek a taste of fine wine,
swirling round, teasing my mouth
I want to devour spoonsful of you sweet
and warm like honey in slow dripping sips,
slipping my tongue between slippery lips.
I want to love you again and again.
Until you're so happy you could cry,
And this is why my wondering sighs
Cannot provide for you my truth.
This is why my eyes cannot lie, and so,
I avoid your gaze in shame.
Shame,
Be it my name.

Though dry I may yet drown
In the past life of another
Peering out with blue-grey eyes

Hard frost stilled my early morning
In splintered shards that pierced the sky
Cold air lacking in weight and time

On that frosty frigid morning,
I too was someone’s child.
Peering out with blue-grey eyes

There among the broken bottles
Rusted cans and oily puddles
Are cigarette butts and lace *******,
Left lying on newspaper spread for the fun
A stark testament on newsprint
near crunchy old eggshells
all these touched by the cold morning sun
and me against the wall, just staring
frozen inert, thoughts muddled and numb

Recently I have become confused
over all but my love for her food.

As slow as a milkshakes release,
My thickening thoughts,
Now turn moldy as cheese;

Still for me no sustenance shows,
angry my stomach growls as it groans.

My sugary cascade no longer is sifting
Flour and yeast on air currents drifting
Honied love buns, no more to be lifting

Her menus are missed, entrées we shared,
Her nourishment given, all with great care.

So long my old friend,
May you continue toast
May you continue to blend,
May you continue to roast

Release me please,
So as a ghost I may float,
Among all those lives,
Still living within me.
Distant their lights,
Stretched out long,
Myself a passenger,
Riding the wavelengths,
Of their radiant creation.
Between the clouds,
Wispy I will soar,
To bring them a song,
From passionate dreams,
where music is born.

With hues of rose and soft scented haze
A pale dusk light recoils under my door
Her welcome shimmer I will see no more
As her piercing absence distains my gaze.

Where now will my light live long and old,
Leaving haunted corners so drafty and cold?
Will my dark desires be free to soar?
As light retreats from under my door?

Curiously,
My books weigh no less,
after I read them.
But how can this be,
After so much they have given?

White as new sliced snow,
Black as the fallen crow,
Time stills its random flow.

Deep as the lover’s swoon,
Sultry as the summer’s noon,
Tender like the bud in bloom.

As autumn falters in crimson color,
Shivering cold in pale chill fire,
Love’s flame will come to an end.

Only then will they know...
Only then will they know.

remembering my mother
i still take off my shoes
just inside the front door

my feet are squishy
from splashing in the rain

i leave gleaming footprints
across the pine floor
trying not to slip and slid

but I just can't seem
to transit quite right

empty is the space
just inside my front door
so full of quiet

asking please for thunder
to appease the rains remorse

I sit on my step and offer you wine,
 And ask where you are going and why?
You answer: "I am discontent yet resolute,
  That I will find rest at the foot of my shadow.
Please allow me to leave, and ask no more questions”.
  As I watch white clouds pass without end.

Where before me,
have my ages then gone?
And where behind me,
Are the coming new birth?
I think of sunlight and earth,
They lost without limit,
without end, without mirth.
In silence I sit alone,
As my tears fall down.
Adding water and salt,
To sunlight and earth.

Could you know, I ponder,
While my love grows unendurable
As I pace around this place,
Crying softly, yet aloud?
Like the first winds of autumn
Winging lonely across the sky.
Could you know how long
Those memories still remain?

On the red rim of the rose,
A thin frost glistens,
Cold in my bedroom,
A bare bulb flickers.
Deeper grows my longing,
Part the curtains with wavering sigh,
To gaze upon the moon,
Single as the frosted rose,
Now cold outside my room.
Above I see the velvet sky,
Below I see the people scenes,
Of an ever-flowing tide,
Bitter between them drifts my sorrow,
Shall I dream at my dusty window?
Dare I admire the frosted rose?
For tomorrow the frost is gone.

What dank dark alley
have you abandoned this night,
crazy yowling trash can cat
to include to me in your song?
why beneath my open window
do you disturb my peaceful sleep?

Not through Spring’s eternal moon
Nor at lighted front of store,
Do you sing your crazy love-sick song,
With lonely yowls forlorn
Do you know I wonder
Where go sleeping souls to slumber?

Be gone your piercing lonely tune
Before I screech my angry song
Before I chuck my shoes at you,
Before you bring the dawn.
Begone, lonely trash can cat,
Allow my dreams reborn,

Show yourself
you darkest of name-callers
Who shouts such vile words
From shadows ink thick with deceit
Have your lies forsaken the light?
Your vulgarity the best you can do?
Retreat from the cover of night
Draw not another laborious breath
In secrete you call out in longing
For the sweetest respite of a song

The climbing vine,
With leaves and tendrils entwined,
Around my unused garden *****,
Such a beautiful sight they made.
Of that wooden handle worn smooth,
By my grasping fingers that grooved,
Lend me your beauty oh climbing vine,
For the garden of my soul to be soothed.

I see your shady greens,
Your emerald gates of earth,
Your vines entwined in pillars of time,
Lush green leaves conceding rebirth.
Your beauties grace in shades sublime,
And I so surprised to be standing there,
In those most glorious greens of you.

A Cloudy Prologue:
  
Do you remember?
When once you were but shadow and mist?
Shadow and mist you say?
“But no”, cries the cloud!
I have always been part of the light.


A Drifting Epilogue:

After a stormy night without clouds,
I rose like a dog to a sound
To the memories of my days yet to come
Yawning large in the mid-morning sun

I yawned like loves loss battered
Drawn in with music un-remembered
Or perhaps a wise old tree awoken
In young fields of silence and sleep

I mused however so briefly
on loves quiet definition of beauty
But could not talk a semblance of reason
Into the weather the clouds or the season

I asked loud for the clouds to stay quiet
Yet release their heaviness required
Raining syllables with color and laughter
As I ran wild in the glistening streets

Because clouds do not intimidate,
Only do they imitate.
Imitations meant only for one.

On alien shores,
   all waves do end.
Their dying breath,
   astounds me.