I’ve been stuck digging through this darkness,
Hoping to uncover a light.
Pillaging for any hope,
Any sign that you’re still here.
I know it’s not worth my while.
You’ll never be coming back.
I guess I shouldn’t have believed you in the first place,
But you’re the one who said “forever”
Your “forever” has grown shorter,
And here I sit alone in the dark.
The place where you kept me for so long.
The place where you left me to carry on.
When I think of the lies you let me believe,
The anger inside me burns white.
The distaste you've given me towards women
Is something that still resides inside my soul.
I never thought hate could breed such passion,
But it’s hate that fuels the *** with these creatures
Full of deceit and disgrace.
But it’s the best *** I've had in years,
And my hatred for you is to thank.

I lost sight
Of all that was important.
Everything got cloudy.
Everything had a brown tint to it.
At first it was fun and games.
A way to loosen the crowd.
Everyone was doin’ it.
Before I knew it
I was no longer looking into the bottle.
I was in the bottle looking out.
Trapped in that cloudy little world.
Every time I tried to reach for help
My arms hit the glass.
Trapped in that cloudy little world.
Every time I tried to see was going on around me
I couldn’t look past the glass.
Before I knew it
You were gone.
And so was my future.
So was our future.
I spent years in that bottle
Waiting for you to come back.
Waiting for the opportunity
To get back everything I had.
My girl.
My life.
My life.
I realize you’re gone
And never coming back.
Just like the ones who’ve come
And gone since you.
But I can still have my life.
My future.
It’s mine.
I finally broke the bottle.
Broke the habit.
Broke the curse.
That delicious poison no longer holds me.
I’m no longer its hostage.
No more its slave.
This is my life.
And the clouds have lifted.
Cloudy no more.
The clouds have lifted.
The sun is shining on me.

Today is the first day on this march to the end of time.
Even if the marching stops
The journey continues on.
I’ve spent so much time wondering about you.
Asking what I did wrong.
So wrapped up in your selfish ways
That I forgot to live my own life.
It’s time to march forward for me
And leave your remnants on the side of the trail behind me.
Behind me is where you need to be.
No longer shall I dwell on “What could have been?”
It’s time for “What’s to come?”
I’m slowly accepting the fact
That what’s to come doesn’t involve you.
The time has come to knock you off that pedestal
And place myself up there instead.
I hope you enjoy the fall.

The noise goes out.
And the silence creeps in.
One more night with the realization
That I am still alone.
Forever?
Who’s to say?
For now.
That’s for sure.
The friends all leave.
But your memories stay.
So vivid they’re haunting.
The nights in the rain.
The days spent in bed.
Without you here I’m a ghost of our past.
When did you go?
Why did you go?
Some questions with no answers.
Was it because you needed to?
Or was it because you needed an escape from me?
These questions pour in.
And make the silence so loud.
I’m done searching for answers in my nightmares.
It’s your turn for that now.