“Anxiety”

Hell awaits seething
As flames flow bleeding
Through my fingers burning
The tears in yearning
Shed in payment red
For my shadows dead
All they sought was redemption
For falling to temptation
Never stopping to think straight
Judgment I laid down on their fate  
Only to find the light
Was always in the right
Again I have fallen prey
To everything the voices say
Anxiety...Anxiety
Its all I can hear
...
Next all I can see
....
I'm sinking beneath
.....
The weight of this sheet
......
Being pulled over my face
.......
Now I share with them their fate

Rolling thunder from its waves
Crashing lightning upon its shores
A ship battered forever in the sea
This is all the chaos and contradiction
A storm left raging deep inside me

Looking inward I see out
into blackness into doubt
A deep dark that screams
it rips apart my life at the seams
A lack of surety stoops me low
like a burden no one else knows
But I will stand up straight and tall
I will not falter or fall
for I hold the sky above you all

Silvery white shines the moon tonight

As it peaks out and beams,

I think maybe I see

A little sad smile,

just the slightest of smirks

Two crinkled eyes,

on a face that would make you cry

Its the full moon,

That makes the night feel like my day

“goodbye”

Don't think
Don't even blink

The stories are coming
The songs are humming

Rising to ****
All those who fill

All imagining dreaming
And pictures sinking

My stories are stirring
The beasts are luring

Don't look
Don't leave

They know your names
Just as they know my shames

I had them under control
Until I tried to console

The monsters I made
Then put in a cage

But I broke
And then they spoke

For When I thought
Is when they fought

Now I see
My burning tree

Its my heart
The very start

Of love and laughter
Along with all i've sought after

But their souls are screaming
As flames flow bleeding
Through my fingers burning
The tears in yearning
Shed in payment red
For my creations dead

Every time I would die
One of them might fly

Afraid I deny their freedom
And sacrifice them fearing

Their fate
Is mine now late

So goodbyes are long
Since soon i’ll be gone

From all this light
And the ceaseless fight
goodbye

Voices murmur in the wind
Whispering thoughts of old
Telling tales of golden days
Never to behold
Walls they murmur back and say
"Golden days are only those
In which we find our yearning"

Beauty demands to be seen
Love demands to be sought after
Life demands to be lived
Pain demands to be felt
and Death demands to be dealt with

But beauty needs to be shown
love needs to be given
life needs an example
pain needs to be parted with
and death needs no logic

If the sky wasn't blue
Or if peoples words we're never true
Even if pigs had wings
Or if we were all made out of string
I would still sing to you
Or at the very least I would try to
So when you need me near
Remember that i hold you dear
Especially when you are sad
Or when you're very mad
Because I love you more than air
And i would do anything to make life fair

You had the key to set me free
So you opened up my chest to see

The heart that loved you pounding
Red and blue and very sad sounding

For though you opened up the chest
My heart you left inside to rest

As a small silver box
Still covered in locks

But never opened it rusted old
Till naught was left but purest gold

I'm me, and me isn't such a bad thing to be.
I am me, and me is a terrible thing to be.

Have you ever forgotten an appointment?

Or maybe a birthday that was full of dissapointment?

Imagine forgetting weeks?

Loseing days!

Can you comprehend the terrible ways?

The torment that ensues?

Now go one step further

Follow me a few steps more in ferver.

I dont want your sympathy.

I need you to comprehend

To simply understand

I lost ten years of my life, and i cant bring them back.

Still i forget, never do i know

If these words were mine

You all are to kind.

For kindness does nothing to help me find

The lost years or missing months

These sprinkled days filled with that ticking clock

Im talking about some serious memory loss

A freak with a gift
The beast able to lift
The very sky
And hold it high
But no one sees
No one heeds
Its whimpers of pain
They only want to gain
Control of a monster
Who tries to say he lost her
His beauty and love
When he reached up above
To help all of you
He lost her too
Now he is alone
Frozen to the bone
With fear and doubt
Unable to shout
That he needs his life
His love his wife
The only one who never screamed
But looked up and beamed
At this monster so strong
Who no one had loved for so long

So run and hide
Any who seek to guide
This giant will
Let loose and ****
Anyone between him
And his most precious gem
You wont be cut
Or clawed and shut
In a coffin cold
Filled with mold
He needs no weapon save his eyes
For they will pierce through your lies
Laying bare your soul
Leaving just a gaping hole

You will die, you will fade
But he cannot, for there will always be shade