Minsan, parang ang haba ng araw kapag inaantay mo itong lumipas nang wala ng kirot. Isang linggong haba.

Nakakapagod pala talaga. Nakakapagod mag-umpisa. 'Yung hahakbang ka nalang paharap, ang tinig, yapos, at bawat pagsulyap pa rin ang makapagpapahakbang sa'yo pabalik.

Kahit wala na.

Tapos susubok na humakbang muli. Paharap. Kahit bawat yapak, pumapatak ang luha sa paanan **** pagód na't namimitig. Babalik. At masusugatan nang minsan pa.

Bitaw ka na. Ibigay mo sa Kanya.

Ang mga bubog sa pagód **** puso na sumusugat sa bawat pagyapak ay dadamputin Niya nang walang pag-a-alinlangan, dahil una na Siyang nasugatan.

Bitaw ka na. May paghilom sa paglaya. At sa paglaya ka papayapa.

Tahan na. Lalaya ka. Lalaya ka dahil pinalaya ka na.

Isang hakbang pa ulit. Sa Kanya lang ang tingin.

Hindi ka pa man lumalapit, handa na Siyang yumakap.

Takbo ka papalapit. Hayaan **** buuin ka Niyang muli.

They handed you lilies and roses, perhaps a hundred
My affection is conveyed through the thorns on My head
In silk ribbon bow their chocolates are sealed
Here’s My vow of eternity for I am the Living Bread

On wheels they came for a romantic rendevouz
I walked My way to Calvary with a cross for you
You were in celestial bliss at their litany of love
I promise you My intimacy as a covenant for life

It’s endearing to be taken to prestige cafés
But My love, your seat is also secured in the heavenly place
You are endeared as darling, bae, and honey
My precious blood calls you lovely and worthy

My body was ripped open by lashes’ embrace
By furious strikes driven through My untainted flesh
Yet in every violent whipping and vehement blow
My heart groans in undying delight, “All for you!”

How could hollow stares at the archaic ceiling
Carve out a face — familiar and fascinating?
3 AM
You were remarkable, and remarkably aching
I wallow in wounding whys and unsurrendered longing

Stars scintillating in the lonesome horizon
Woeful what ifs come screaming in unison
Pillows turn to piercing haven
When hopeless hows veil the tranquil and sane

Sometimes, there is not definitive reason and fitting ideology
That would excuse a person from walking away
There is only one oppressive paradox it carries: the ephemerality of a person coincides with eternalness of memories
But —
If holding on to memories bleeds
I shall henceforth set you free

Back when everything felt right
Back when arms held too tight

Warmth

I don't think something like that is all that easy to forget

"Let's go sailing!"

Only we would be sailing apart

I wonder

If you were less self-seeking
How would you delve into the grandeur of my affection?

If you were less vulnerable
How would you brave my monumental walls of mistrust?

If you were less coward
How would you defile the sanctity of my chaos?

If you were less shattered
Would you cradle my fragmented soul once more?

Bawat hibla ng salitang nagsisi-alpasan, ikaw ang tono, ang sentro, binabaybay bawat bituin na iyong nahawakan

Mga matang mangha ang sumasalubong
Na wari'y pinagmamasdan ang marilag na dapit-hapon

Nang isang gabi, nalupig ng madilim na kalawakan ang mga estrelyang nagniningning sa mga palad **** gasgas sa pagkakadapa
Tumakbo ang mga manonood palayo sa iyo
Ayaw nila ng dilim
Kikukutya nila ang hindi kumikinang

"Ganoon ba talaga iyon? Aakayin ka sa alapaap, ngunit kakawala sa karimlan?" sambit ko

Subalit salamat
Sa pagbitaw, nabanaag ang sinag ng yumayapos na bukang-liwayway
Naring ang umaalingawngaw na bulong, na tila humi-hele, ika'y hinihilom
Saad Niya, "Bangon. Kahit mag-isa. Mag-isa, kasama Ako."

I was in a forlorn room combatting beasts without bodies, only mouth that spits out oppression
Some lit up a candle and made their presence felt
By the door are familiar appearances simpering at my persistent maladies
Panting, I attempted to reach over their arms albeit not one of them extended his hand

Perhaps, it's time to sever ties with those who are standing near but are never actually there

Appalling, but warm
The interrelatedness of desolation and delight
Between bonds
That trace sanity and unison

Solitude;

Liberate the heart caged in rancor,
a firm abode
If time always rushes
Cease its persistent race
Never let it impede reconciliation
Delay its cascading pace

You are riveting

I am drawn to the abyss of your sublimity
As your pen lands decisive kisses on the paper
Could I prolong what is momentary?
For I am lost, lost in rhapsody

You are exceptional

I don't mind you being foreign, flawed, fanatical
Let me disentangle your profound subtlety
For our souls resemble, though not submitted to perpetuity

Man --

I am a pilgrim in the museum of your words
Enamored of your celestial depth
And if I ever lose my way
You wouldn't, couldn't, musn't find me

I am but a pilgrim, not meant to stay