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Ren Mayloft May 2016
Something I say to myself,
Setting up a good challenge,
Press the record button,
Take the picture,
Own what I am.
That is what I dare you to do.
I dare you to
Type the message,
Find a place to put your ideas,
Let fingers fly over keys,
Don't be afraid to fall to your knees,
Just go for it.
Yeah!!!!!
Ren Mayloft May 2016
Hands,
With their ability to create or destroy.
What stories can I tell with them?
How do I know what to use them for?
Creating and destroying in cycles,
Going through times of misuse,
Periods of not being used
Catching the fall to the ground,
Hiding quiet sound,
Movements so small and so decisive,
Making art and music,
Until they fall silent,
No quiet paper folding or sounds coming from an instrument,
Just silence floating in the air,
As they just hover there,
Letting me chose what to do with them.
Ren Mayloft May 2016
Something everyone desires to be,
At even a little capacity,
Humans want to be so similar to each other,
Then at the same time want to be different and stand out,
Leaving room for doubt,
People believing that differences are all good or all bad,
Normal is customizable though,
Depends on where people are,
Who can be considered a "star"
While not being removed too far,
Giving them a human element
For others to relate to,
Hoping they aren't alone,
Looking up to someone on an imaginary throne,
A place they got placed,
Having their progress traced,
Planes, train, cars, and buses chased
For no reason in particular,
Besides the fact they are so normal,
Yet somehow stand out,
In the perfect balance of normal and idol.
Ren Mayloft Apr 2016
There comes a time where I feel everything,
Cold air's sting,
The bend of my ring,
My breathing,
Movements I make,
Along with my slight shake,
With each breath I take,
Regulating myself,
Wrapping up my feelings on the shelf,
Containing everything,
Refusing to let my voice sing,
Words so familiar they are the only ones I know,
Making me have the urge to just go,
Not with the flow,
Just get out and move,
Take the step out my door,
Everything will be alright then,
I'm sure,
Then when I take that step,
I am aware,
The cold in the air,
Wind that whips hair in my face leaving a sting,
Hearing birds sing,
Feeling everything around me,
Being aware,
Quietly and thoughtfully,
Wondering why I ever gave everything up.
Ren Mayloft Apr 2016
Soft whispers,
Floating in the air,
Knowing that someone is there,
A quiet soft stare,
Most gentle voices carry me to sleep,
Moving from ear to ear,
Erasing my fear,
A few times bringing a quiet tear,
Falling into a normal routine,
Sleeping nightly to the voices of strangers,
A screen removing all the dangers,
Slipping into a comfortable tingle,
The static of silence broken by the kind voice,
Relaxed by an unconscious choice,
Floating into a state new to me,
Calmly free,
Aware of everything that is there,
Knowing that I demand the quiet,
A quiet that is never violent,
Keeping me safe broken by one voice,
My calming choice.
Let me just add a note, this was about ASMR. Which stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response and I really like it so have a little bit of writing.
Ren Mayloft Apr 2016
For the first time,
I'm trying too hard to rhyme,
Pushed by influences,
General curiosity,
The severity impact,
My mind fully in tact,
I am still myself,
Yet I do not look like me,
I thought of my skin I wanted to be free,
Somehow I found that to not be true,
Leading me to know exactly what to do,
Rubbing at my face,
Not caring about possible grace,
I could not see me,
The thing staring back at me was not what I was used to,
Not a bad experience,
An eye opener,
Finding the thing I needed was...nothing,
No change,
All rubbed off now,
So I stare,
At the face now there,
Fixing my hair,
Realizing that I was entirely in that moment,
There was nothing new still the old,
And yet it looked so different,
Normal,
Informal,
The way it always is,
I thought it was what I wanted,
When it really wasn't,
I saw myself for how I really looked,
Not wanting the appointment that was booked,
Though it was needed,
There was no need to have to go so far.
So believe it or not this was about my first make up experience. A strange, but needed thing.
Ren Mayloft Apr 2016
It hits you,
Figuring out what is true,
Exactly what you need to do,
Managing time,
Money,
Resources,
Nothing new,
It is pretty much all humans do,
It hurts,
Realizing all that what you loved and got you excited were lies,
You're being irrational over those flies,
Just stop crying,
What is your problem?
There is nothing to worry about.
Wrong.
There are so many things,
To cry about,
To lie about,
To scream about,
We do what we must,
Even if we fall to strategically placed dust,
Lost little creatures,
Accepting tiny new features,
As excuses,
Mental truces,
Formed out of necessity,
Breaking promises to yourself,
Coming to terms with who you are,
Settling for a self provided star,
It might look weird,
That is nothing to be feared,
It makes me sane,
Even if it is in vain,
I try and do what I can,
To ignore the parts I hate about who I am,
That is how I live,
Or exist at the very least,
I am both beauty and the beast,
Two of my many sides,
Each one a different ride,
For specific times,
Some just for rhymes,
As though it reaches,
Or even teaches,
Trying to show what I learned,
Dealing with everything I yearned for,
Waiting for what is in store,
Wanting to disappear alone on a shore,
And at the same time wanting to be here,
Living in mild fear,
Over just about everything,
Most of all when voices ring,
Loudly and softly in the depths of my mind,
Wanting me to make the find,
Let it enter my thoughts,
Blurring it like too many shots,
Forget that though,
Remember to breathe,
Don't let anyone hear it,
Or you'll have more problems,
With even less to solve them with.
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