Can I have a new body please
One that works
One to carry me throughout the day,
Without knowing constant hurt.

A heart that knows no sorrows,
Not mended up with tape.
One that feels love and joy,
Not one that is filled with hate.

A brand new stomach, fully functional
One that can digest
A gut that can take the burden of my suffering,
But now, I digress

A bladder that is of normal size
That doesn't keep me up at night
A bladder that isn't nothing but a pain
One that doesn't seek revenge just to spite

A brain that is fully functional
One that allows me to be at peace
One devoid of anxieties and fears
One that doesn't ruminate on the grief

If only my body was working,
The way it was meant to be.
I wouldn't be crying a river
Thinking that maybe it's me.

An angel in the morning, a devil at night

Say one wrong word and incur the wrath
Steer your course clearly outside its path
One split second, moods change on a dime
Wondering to myself what is it this time?
Fragile as a newborn
A quiet soul tinged with rage and scorn
Multi faceted, tucked away beneath a facade
Unable to see this as anything but odd

The most generous person I ever did see
Only in a moment to tear it away from me
Moments of love, moments of bliss
Passion and fire dispersed through a kiss
Lyrics of adoration and adoring praise
Concealed within his gaze.
Clandestine emotions try to take hold
Boiling within, ready to unfold

A rage that would put Hyde to shame
Eager to pass on any of the blame
A raging fire stokes within the heart's chambers
Seemingly oblivious to its obvious dangers
Ready to burst at any second
Easily comes forth when it is beckoned
Do what you can to prevent it from explosion
And be aware when it is close to implosion

Fiercely volatile, ready to combust
A mortal who appears to be healthy and robust
Warning label should say handle with care
Emotions no matter how extreme, are eager to be shared
Trying desperately to hide it from others
Thoughts are racing, feeling smothered
Every range of feeling  from melancholy to delusions
Is it reality, or is it all an illusion?

Gone is the love
Which held us together
Gone is the glue
That bonded us forever
Too many words have been exchanged
My heart can't take any more
My soul is dead inside
How did this become so deranged?
The enamor faded from your eyes
No longer do I have my soul mate
Tuning me out with the radio
Stifling my heart-wrenching cries
Insults fly at me from every direction
Blindsided in the most unthinkable way
So numb inside that I don't know if I am alive
Praying so deeply for a resurrection
Wanting to go back in time
Erase all the memories and all the pain
Go back and prevent our first meeting
Wishing I never had known this love that was once mine

I am dead inside
You killed me slowly
Drained my body
Broke my heart
And buried my soul
Every fiber of my being deadened
Nerves numb
Heart barely beating
Now I am dead.

Why did I ever love you
What is there to love?
Going to sleep, feeling snubbed?
What about the criticism about how I spend my money?
You think you can control me, you got another thing coming honey.
Manipulating me with lavish gifts, loving words and poems.
Thinking I'm stupid enough to not see our relationship is broken?
Throwing a fit when you don't get your way,
Ignoring my needs every single day.
Denying me of the love I crave,
You are slowly digging my early grave.
Shattering my self esteem seems to be your intent,
When I try to say anything, you always dissent.
My words don't matter, I am worthless,
Still your tirade continues, you are merciless.
Please let me go and stop this oppression,
Time to allow someone else the pleasure of this succession.

Hurtful words come in every direction
No longer is anything left to my discretion
How could this happen, how could this be?
How could my prince betray me?
The love in my heart waxes and wanes
But the incessant pain still remains
Letting go of hope, facing the truth
It never was me, it was always you.

Hold me close again,
Don't tell me this is the end.

Alcohol on your breath,
How did we get into this mess?

The nicotine clings to my bed,
Just like the lies you said.

You took my fragile heart,
And filled it with your art.

The masterpiece of your lies,
Spoken right to my eyes.

Lie to me one last time,
Tell me it's all going to be fine.

Waiting for a love to fill up my senses
Strong enough to break down my defenses
A feeling of complete and utter bliss
Unwaning passion enveloped in every kiss
Feeling complete, like I'm a full person
Nothing can make our relationship worsen
The two of us and no one else
A feeling that I have never felt
A bond so strong no one can break
This meeting wasn't accident; it was fate
Gentle words and selfless actions
Nothing less than a loving reaction
The highest level of respect
Love so precious, it can't be wrecked
Anything in the world I would do to keep
The angel who protects me and makes my heart leap

Weak, empty, miserable
That's what everyone sees
If only they just took the time
To see that isn't me.....



Judgements abound disquiet my voice
If only they knew this isn't my choice
Everyone's appraisals overwhelm my senses
At the ready to prepare my defenses
Combative and ill-tempered is my demeanor
Making everything all the bit keener
So much stirring underneath the exterior,
But you can't see it because you feel superior

We are all one,
Accept it or not.
Human beings are one,
Despite what you once thought.

Treat everyone the same,
Give them all what they deserve.
The truth is, what we all need is love,
Something everyone should be served.

Hate and intolerance is the easy way
Forgiveness is a much harder road
It is something not much thought about
Something that is not well-known.

Practice tolerance and you will be freed.
The peace is yours for the taking,
The fire inside you to be quelled.
A life of understanding is yours for the taking.

People let you down,
And people tear your heart out
The only thing in this world
You can rely on is your own clout

Come into this world alone
And death is the same
We are all here in this life together
So on whom can we place the blame?

Stop making one person everything
And letting them hold so much worth
Putting them on a pedestal
Is doomed to cause inevitable hurt

At one point in your life
You realize there is no one on which to rely
Time to face the painful truth
As you finally open your eyes

The only one you have is yourself
So learn to treat it right
No one can be relied upon to carry you
Through your inescapable plight.

Words draw blood like a knife
Piercing my heart, causing endless strife
The agony I'm in seems to never end
Worried my shattered heart will never mend
Tears fall on deaf ears
No one to allay my fears
When will you see the hurt you've caused
Was never at all my fault?

Why must you hurt me so much
Why must you break me down
Why must you take every ounce of my strength
Why must you hurt me so?
You bleed me dry
You exhaust all my reserves
Not a tear drop to spare
Not a  piece of my heart that's unbroken
These words cut through me
Even the ones physically conveyed, unspoken
You shatter my soul
Every fiber of my being
Begging for mercy
Why must I be unworthy?
Will this ever let up
Will this ever end
So many words I want to say, just can't push send.
Help me understand, let me into your world
Tell me why I can't be your perfect and ideal girl

My sheets still smell like you.
The nicotine clings to it like glue.

Still here, where you left this deep, gaping hole.
The poison of your lies, the poison of your soul.

Through your eyes, I spotted our demise.
Fake smile, fake words, everything is lies.

Faking everything just to get what you wanted,
Now I'm stuck here, feeling haunted.

Tell me have you had your fill?
Was I your cheap thrill?

Lie to me, tell me I'm the one,
Have you had your fun?

Throw me in the trash,
Where you keep your stash.

I'll join all the rest,
Since I failed your test.

Do you feel proud?
Do you see me, now?

You left me broken,
With the others, unspoken.

No, I won't shed a tear,
Now, all is clear.

You think you're a man,
But you'll never understand.

You'll never know love,
Nothing to speak of.

Now I'm the one who's sane,
Since I defaulted on your game.

So much love, unrequited love
Nothing hurts me more

The sound of your voice makes my heart soar
Your face makes me beam with glory

When I'm with you all I want to do is sing my praises
But to you its nothing, you go through so many phases

I just want to adore you and love you the only way I know how
Seems to me , though, that its too late now