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My memories of you,
tend to fade to grey.
Your face is just a mere smudge,
and I like it that way.
Your voice is a crackle
in my mind,
like a thin branch,
snapping,
snapping like the moment,
the moment I was finally free.
Free of the hate.
The anger.
The pain.
I've burnt the photographs
and now
I barely remember you name.
YOU'RE A ****
YOU'RE WORTHLESS
YOU'RE NOTHING
YOU'RE FAT
                  UGLY
                  ****
                  ****
                 ****

I am not a ****!
Women are called a **** by almost everyone. A boyfriend, he doesn't like your outfit, "****" a best friend saw you talking to the guy she likes "****" a random guy driving by in his car "****"
His smile was crooked.
Shy, he was.
Shy, at first.
Our eyes would secretly meet.
Those silent conversations.
Shy, he was.
His smile was crooked.
It was sincere.
I've never seen such a smile.
A shy smile.
A genuine smile.
A scared smile.
A smile for me.
The boy with the crooked smile,
smiled for me.
my best friend, my boyfriend, my boy with the crooked smile.
Darkness envelopes me.
I shut my eyes tight to stop the images from floating.
Darkness fills me.
Fills me with fear.
Fear of the banging.
The scratching.
The ripping.
The thumping.
I lay in the darkness.
As the voices encase the room.
Whispering to me.
Taunting me.
Laughing.
Screaming.
Darkness envelopes me.
Silent whispers.
Under covers,
legs intertwined.

Light kisses,
sun rays,
birds chirping.
    Day dreams.
and then
he looked
into my eyes
and I knew
this was
the beginning
of something
unbelievable.
first poem. Short and sappy.

— The End —