Your shadow still haunts
The deepest parts of me
Your thinly curved fingers
Still trace along my lips
Why'd you have to leave?
You never knew how I really felt that night
How my insides yearned for you
"I love you"
You told me as I fell with the rain outside your car window
You called me beautiful
"I am not beautiful"
No reply
Just a tender brush of the lips upon mine
I fell,
Fell,
F
E
  L
    L
For every part of you,
Just along side the rain outside that car window

We are cousins
Related by blood
Growing up
Together
Like
Siblings.

But we are cousins
And cousins don't get jealous
Cousins don't cry
When the other
Loves another.

However we are cousins
And everything is wrong
You crave for the wrong
And I dread the fulfillment
From the sins
We are
Committing.  

"We are cousins, right?"

You say sweetly to me
We lay in bed together
Hands intertwined
Under the darkness
And the comfort
Of the thick blanket.

I say nothing
Uncurling my fingers from yours
I turn to
Face away
And shut my eyes.

It was dark
It was quiet
Yet it felt so bright
So noisy
Under the uncomfortable
Silence.

You say nothing to me
And wrap your arms around me.

I flinch.

A sweet whisper
Flows into my ears
Sweeter than any other

Simple words
Simple meanings
Time passes
New meanings.

Wrong meanings.

The hidden bitterness
Starts to show
I shake
Uncontrollably

I had no words to say
To the words you had
We are cousins
Relishing in our sins.

You, who wanted this to go on
I, who wanted this to all end.

You, whom I cared for so much because I watched you grow.
I, whom you needed wrongly and mistakingly.

*"I love you."