Lead me down the lonesome road
Fight me through the darkness
Scream to the top of your lungs
Hide me from the heartless

Drown me in the shadows
Peel off my fearful face
Fake my sappy love song
I want to die in Grace

Ask me if I care
I dare you.

Go ahead and tell me how you feel
I'm not listening.

"You disgust me. I hate you. Go away. Get out. Leave me alone. *******."

Endless I say
go ahead, spread your fears

Ask me if I care, I dare you.

I look back

See what i see?
Look there,
Smell what I smell
Smell this
Feel what I feel
Feel here

Close. Too close? Close enough
See me, smell me, feel me

Now,
I look forward

Too close? Closer now, more than ever

Feelings..
Thoughts
Fears
I'm scared but I don't have a reason to be

A knot in my throat
A choke in my words
The batting of my eyes trying to keep the fear from arising
The flushed cheeks on my face
I have felt so much the past 8 years
How can I tell what I feel now, is how I'll feel in the next year's to come.

Is what I'm feeling, rushed?
Am I adding onto my biggest fear?
Am I trying to push away because I know my past may be held against me?

I am good, but am I good enough

My feelings are unsure, these I haven't felt before
My heart tears into two
People drawn apart
That too familiar feeling of being alone in the dark
As I think to myself, what have I done
With the quickness of the hand,
I take what I still love
And I run
I run away from what this means
Together forever?
No.

I used to love me
I used to love us.
Married for all the wrong reasons
Who do we blame?
No happy future here
Just selfishness and shame
We used to be amazing
We used to be in love.
Now I have torn feelings, after each and every hug.

The tear no one sees
The ache no one feels.
Living in a lie,
Is this even real?
I've mixed so many emotions
Just trying to find love.
I lost myself somewhere
Somewhere I never wanted to go

I almost want to cry..
i feel myself building up that urge to just yell, 'why!??!'
i can see now how i wish i still had you :(
seeing you kiss her really hurts me.
i know we have moved on, but your love still holds my heart :(
why dont we talk anymore? why aren't you there?
did i say something wrong to you? or do you just not care?
i really wish i could express myself to you,
but i feel that if i do, i will just push you away, or make you sad.
i wonder if i just want to make you want me so i feel wanted.
i should feel wanted, but not in that way..
i dont know, maybe i just miss you,
or maybe.. just maybe..
i still long for your love..

:/

i want you to want me.
i need you to need me.
i'd love you to love me.
i'm begging you to beg me.

You know,

  Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I hadn't met you.
You have changed my life and I can't thank you more.

  You make me so happy and comfortable, I feel like singing along
to my favorite songs just because I am so happy being with you.
La La La La Da Da Da Duummm La La La :) there i go, singing along.

  I can't even imagine sleeping without you beside me to hold onto
in the middle of the night.
When I wake in the morning, I look forward to seeing your face.
  I enjoy your music, and your passion for what you love.
I admire your honesty and trust.
  I especially admire that you are stronger than I expect.
Through our fits and snips, each time I turn around,
there you are, with a smile on your face.
                                                           ­  and that is why, I Love You.

  I say, but never truly say,
                                                        that....­
I love to hear every thing you have to say.
I love to learn every thing you teach.
I love to listen when you speak.
I just, love you.

&& I'm so happy I married you.