Desperate pleas
Incessant moans

Where
Can I fit in

The more I cry
The more it seems
People point
Their fingers at me

The clock ticking and
My day is passing
Slowly
Painfully

But

Surely

The moments I dread
The tears I've shed
How is this possible

Numbness
Overwhelms me

Hope is dispersed

It feels
Like a gun to my head
The veins in my fingers
Pulsating
At the trigger

Ending it all
Is this my call?

Life penetrates us
From our first breath

Life has taken something over
From us all
And we don't ever
Have an option

Feelings

The emotions that
We all experience

Someone. Anyone.
define it

We lose control
The moment we come alive

Hunger pangs kick in,
As well as the thirst, for love
Love from our parents
And our families
Friends.

Out first cry for warmth, for food and air,
As we desperately cling onto something, or someone

As newborns
We have no choice
But to feel something

We cannot force it
The devoid of emotions
Numbness of feelings
It is beyond us

It nurtures us
Into adults with yet
An even greater burning passion
To feel

This essential misery-fies us
An evil good necessity

But why
Can't we embrace it?

Burning

I feel it

The passion in me

Unstoppable, an impeccable force
Every second
It tingles in my bones
Runs along my veins

With every thump, of my heart
With every pulse through my arteries

I crave

Dancing

Hair whipping
Feet pointing
Arms swinging
Body twisting
Free twirling

I can feel it

The thirst
The hunger

To dance
Express myself
Through body art
Movements
The only kind of art I understand

Relentlessly hoping
For one day
To be set free

Bounding off
To where I first started
A plain white paper
The times where I was able to be creative
Let my inner feelings flow

And paint
Paint my own story
With my body

And in time

I will look back and appreciate
My chest will swell
Pride

I will have accomplished
more than ever before

Because I know
For one

Passion brings you far
It takes you wherever you want
However you want

Because you are the artist
Of your own life story.

when you draw near
it's as if
the air thins
and I forget my breathing mechanism

when you draw close
my breath sharpens
shallow inhalation taking over

my pupils dilate
heart accelerates
muscles contract and

my mouth twists into a crooked smile
not too big, to the point
you think I'm overly excited
because of your presence
but not so small
you think
you're nothing to me at all

that's the multitude of the effect
the effect you have on me
pathetic
isn't it

because  all I can do
is hope this incessant feeling fades
before it eats me
from the inside out