I stand at the kitchen sink and let the water run scalding. Steam lifting from the dingy metal surface like banner clouds lifting into the early morning sky. I stand at the kitchen sink and scrub the skin on my hands, the water turning to mud in my fingers. I stand at the kitchen sink with a knife to my flesh and pull back the skin that I'm so desperately trying to escape. One by one I tear my nails from their beds. They clink as I drop them into the sink. Standing at the kitchen sink, I watch the brown water turn to blood, red running from the faucet. I dip my hands in boiling bleach. The smell reminds me of home. I stand at the kitchen sink and let the salt run down my face and burn away whatever flesh is left till I am staring at smooth white porcelain. I watch my tears run down the drain and imagine it was me. I sit in front of the sink, craddling my newly baptised sins that were never mine to bare.

Nothing will ever wash away the filth