On the keys as my fingers tap
I hear within a rap

*if you've something to say
better do it than say
be a worthier sample of human race
give a cared look on the dog's face
to your door he has strayed
stayed
made
you a kinder man
better if you can
spend some time with him
abandoning your absurd dream.

It's time to move away* she thought
and without a parting note
quietly took her breath away.

None knew what made her cease her breath
there were gossip and lore and lot of myth
she looked quite a happy girl some said
said others it was her exam grade,
jilted in love, with her lover had a tiff
none was certain she left in what belief!

Was it the anguish of a deeply hidden pain
that made her escape find in quitting a gain
living seemed too miserable breath too taxing
to transcend all these she had to spread her wing!

The hearts she broke groped ever in darkness
for in them only would live her footprint's trace
no answer was there in their wails of the night
why she chose to take off for a flight in starlight!

One day at a time is what we need to borrow
within a day is a world held sublime
why waste this day in the thought of tomorrow
when a day can be made into lifetime!

Now I know
my friend my enemy
is only me.

It was tough job going home from the evening shift
he would keep coming back before taking the lift
stand gazing intently at the office noticeboard
umpteenth time reading the roster word by word!

Not sure he had seen it right would find someone out
tell him please see my morrow's shift to dispel his own doubt
I want to be doubly sure haven't missed out something, mate,
please do me this favor I'll give you one cigarette.

Knowing him well that man would say for you can find it out
but one *** is not enough to clear all your doubt
will tell you the morrow's shift surely dear mate
only if at the canteen give me the treat of one omelette.

After the deal was fully done would end this funny affair
convinced of next day's schedule he would come downstairs
the night already was quietly deep with not a soul on the road
it had taken him quite some time to decipher the noticeboard!

When came the tram splitting the night below a crescent moon
he would raise his hand but strangely wouldn't board it soon
till someone would drag him in much against his will
knowing he would be stranded if he missed the last vehicle.

The dogs' bark welcomed him home as he reached its door
the neighborhood was in slumber known by buzzing snore
but then told him his riddled mind he certainly couldn't tell
if at all this was his home and he should ring the bell!

As he stood quite confused with the minutes growing more
light footsteps were heard inside a woman opened the door
he asked her if a man of his name was residing in that house
it's no time for such madness would pull him in his spouse!

She bobs like a gull on the breaking waves
to go far out in the sea is what she craves
on her hair froths the spray of saline sand
she's the woman on the edge of rainbow land.

On the sea she isn't the woman I know too well
she rises to touch the sky with the waves swell
a stronger stranger girl keen to break the chain
fly away unshackled in her freedom's gain.

She isn't the same woman in the tidal brace
sheds the veil rides her will to be sea's empress
when the waves lave her face in its magic roar
in her dream touches rim of a distant shore.

I don't know why I love her high on the sea
where her eyes are far unfamiliar alien to me
she rides the waves within craves the rainbow land
dreams to go with the flow from clutching hand.

over the taps of fingers' dance
she says dinner is ready
giving me the appetizing chance
insanity's remedy!

it's her way to break my spell
of words welled up in stack
this medicine she applies well
poems don't fill the stomach!

till that time all she said
were just bla bla bla
till on the table dinner is laid
wafts the food's aroma!

it finds its target the poet's nostril
shears the strings of thought
a stir in the bowel kills the will
drives me to get the dinner hot!

fingers soon dance on the dinner plough
feed my taste bud with sweet treat
she knows it well don't ask me how
to give me from poetry retreat!

I visit that place often
where the road takes a blind turn
walk along all the lost men
in them wildfires burn.

I visit that place often
where the road is a fossil
of past years' left behind pain
that rancours inside still.

I visit that place often
where still stands the ruin
of all the grown men
who once there had been.

I visit that place often
where lie the ashes' urn
sigh the souls of dead men
killed by lovers' spurn.

I visit that place often
for it's where I made a start
to gather first grain of corn
heart's first stardust.

I think not to write
any more love poem
her strands of silver hair
face's blossoming striations
and sunset pinks on her earlobes
rekindles a flame
that begets
one more love poem!

In the mirror I see his reflection.

*Father reminds me of my mortality.

In this city of a billion feet
striking the concrete
if may found one face
in one recess
one man standing on the asphalt
when halts to see
the arch of heaven's vault
finds within a treasure
beyond gain's measure
and at day end
when his feet turn home bound
his heart contented with all not found
lays peacefully his head
on the resting bed
forgetting all ache on the asphalt
turn eyes on the heaven's vault
till his dreams fetch him a meaning
of his flight with the earth's spin!

Every Sunday he went to the church
wasn't too religious not really much
dressed in his best and tidily neat
he followed the routine by sheer habit
he sought nothing never spelt his wants
joined the others in the rhythmic chants
till years made him frail and old
found him a coffin dark and cold
carried on the hearse to the church he went
prayers were held he remained silent.

As soon as I start feeling low
My spirit dips down in the pit
The dog reminds me take it slow
Ease down will soon melt the heat.

Your life is so blessedly made
Gifted with so much of gain
Yet you are always afraid
Of even a minuscule pain!

You grumble at everything sore
Sulk in your mires of sorrow
While I wag happy at your door
Without having much of tomorrow!

The dog he knows it too well
Ever eludes a man happiness
He looks for it too much outside
When within him it dwells!

At the last hut of the village
Lives the girl of tender age
Her eyes though love filled
Meet only the long paddy field!

Forlorn on a lonely summer noon
She hugs her image on the stream
Wishes on her way would come soon
The boy she had found in her dream!

The last hut is ever too far
But for the winds blown away
None knows if ever a traveler
Would stray to her door one day!

She hugs her image on the stream
Washes her cute rice bran face
If ever comes the boy of her dream
Finds out her last hut address!

Her heart weaves a wish upon a star
On moonlit nights in silvers’ gleam
Next morn if the boy comes to her
She would ever cage him in her dream!

Have you ever heard
how in the lone night's shadow
sings the wind in the bamboo groves
a dirge for the times long ago!

If roams the dark your eye
pause on the dancing strings
you would hear the fireflies' sigh
in flutter of pain's quiet wings!

Think it not a mere windy trick
in its blowing making eerie howls
gathered there the dead souls speak
of the times as old as the owls!

If ever in the dark you are home bound
can hear the groves mourn the long dead
their moans rising up in whistling sound
till all griefs at end of night fade!

If you happen to pass the groves by
when dewy tears sheds the moon
stop awhile to hear the souls sigh
mourning times that went too soon!

the only one that can let me down
is myself.

The more I travel

*why it seems still less traveled?

She's in deep sleep
rests her head on my shoulder

I hold it light as treasured keep
years rewind to grow less older!

If only I had loved more
than write about it!

Milk rice curd and fish
brinjal chilli and gourd
not one item I would miss
not forget one word.

Mom would say write them down
so don't you leave anything
banana butter tea bread brown
a world of goods to bring.

I run on the way muttering those stuff
curd and fish fine tea
on my head they hit me rough
jumble my memory.

The sky today is yawning blue
clouds sail like milky raft
in the wind is a drift of sweet brew
incense's misty waft!

Walk easy boy don't go so fast
aren't the birds on mystery flight
look up to see how in wind's gust
soared high in the sky the kite!

There's a crowd in charm of magic wand
a snake dancer with his wooden flute
brought bagful tricks from distant land
snakes caught from jungles remote!

On the playground is running a match
ball rolling from net to net
why not stop for some minutes' watch
keep brinjal and gourd on wait!

The field is green trees' shade alluring
dreams come in bird wings' flap
milk rice curd now a distant thing
the boy takes a nebulous nap.

I hover over your words
not for perfections.

don't paint me an azure sky
cotton clouds
a field of sunflower
gold crests of afternoon waves
dark labyrinths
inner demons
or even angel faeries

for my life of half drawn images
half digested joys
faintly lit phantoms
rough edge
rugged walkway

write me out
a flawed poem
imperfected to the hilt
no structure
no style
wild jots of your thoughts
just like you and me

*flawed but heavenly!

Stepping out of me
ME encounters me
He doesn’t have my grace
Tells me on the face
It’s ME
Inside of you
That lends you voice
Otherwise you dumb doll
Is just a meatball
A zombie without ME
Eyes that don’t see
Ears that don’t hear
Live blind without a mind
Beneath skin bones 206
Always in a fix
Till breathes this ME
In you
Poetry

When he steps in
I see his reflection
On the screen!

Under the sunburned clay tiles
Her face was a pond.

Sweats’ dewdrops on her almond skin
Keenly waited for the kiss of soil
And in the tree lined coolness of the thatched hut
She paused for me from her rustic toil.

Why do the beauties we deform
Bury the raw under heaps of vain
**** the eyes’ wild glowworms
Plant there a mascara stain!

A girl of toil a girl of soil she’s rustic bred
Never deems never dreams for beauty’s parade!

Her face was a tree lined pond
Her heart’s ocean
I never could delve.

Only know this much
Under the sunburned tiles
Her one fleeting smile
I would carry through the coming miles.

Don’t need a reason why it happens so
Around me sparkle thousand stars
I beam in the happiness’ radiant glow
For having another day of loving her!

Dispel dark clouds the mind is set free
Dreadful stains on its wall disappear
It feels just enough to have her with me
Having another day of loving her!

Heals all the pain the one mystic light
Agonies turn back to recede far
It shows me the way to tide over the night
For having another day of loving her!

I feel so blessed when breaks a new dawn
Though it hides the east’s morning star
Reminds the bird chirps I’m not alone
With me is another day of loving her!

To me only she leaves it
In turn I leave it to her
In our hiding holes of habit
Things don’t move any far.

In this funny game
Consensus is scarce
In the fear of blame
Taking a decision scares.

She tells me it’s for you to decide
Ways to cut the rising bills
How to stop our savings’ slide
Still have two square meals.

I tell her in your hands is the rein
To check unneeded outflow
Find some ways to build a gain
Some savings for the future to show.

She retorts don’t say you’ve no clue
The way I manage the pence
What you bring can hardly accrue
Any surplus post expense.

Things go on like they did before
With us never reaching a deal
Yet our lives happily soar
The way we lovingly will.

When at roadside stands
I see a little mag of poetry
can't help mutter two words

lapis lazuli

Must have brought it a poet like him
lover of letters dealer of dreams
drunk in the elixir of emotion
added a drop more to the spilling ocean!

In the vastness grew in one nook
bearded youth with poetic look
his words tattered on the canvas a rag
bringing this world one little mag!

There wasn't a reader an eye to see
the poet's journal sold for free
he carried them bagful if could find
ears willing a discerning mind!

Then they shrunk the hopes high soared
wings broken the bard was floored
in the desert sands lay dried poetry
dying unprized lapis lazuli!

No question asked nor rose a frown
a wasted poet was the known verdict
he put his pen forever down
till breathed his last a drug addict!

When I aim high

*hope's ashes with the winds fly!

From behind smoke
scribes the words' kitbag
his mind reveals.

Where the river meanders for the sky’s embrace
Her lovelorn bank pines in the banyan’s shade
Blue ripples sing to soothe her travel’s stress
Lay me when all poems are dead in my head.

Write me an epitaph here rests the river poet
Who loved the cotton clouds mirrored on her breast
As her tides rose high laden with desire’s weight
He broke away from chains to madly sail her crest.

Where shines the moon makes the lover’s pathway
Flows quiet the river in her waves shadows sway
Night heron’s feet kiss her soft feathered bed
Lay me in silence when all poems are dead.

Lay me soft down make for me a space
On her alluvial soil in her riverine grace
In her diurnal shine and night’s saline kiss
The river poet would find his eternal peace.

When he felt horses were a passe
bought a pair of zebra from the zoo
got them hitched to his carriage
believe it or not it's true!

Soon he got a trainer on hire
to train them to pull his car
the news soon got into the press
he had put the zebras on harness!

The man given easily to caprice
never once felt the slightest remorse
for ruining those dumb animal's peace
the zebra could not be a striped horse!

One of the pair died shortly
the other was left to pull his car
he would be seen riding merrily
dressed in his royal attire!

To him a sport he was never ashamed
used to boast of his crudely callous fun
a zebra like a horse though can't be tamed
with his carriage had to make a fast run!

Every time I unwrap a chocolate
I think of Shil Grandpa.

The thin and tall man forever in a long coat
Towered over the sandstone roads of the sleepiest town
Where only steam hoots broke the silence
And a lone tree on the ground of Ghost Bungalow
Still spewed smoke of the thunder that burned it!

His house was at the eeriest corner of the town
Too large for just one man to inhabit it
The hush on its tree lined walkway was deafening
And the garden uncared just grew like wild!

He would stop the moment he sighted a child
Dip his hand in the sweet mystery of his coat pocket
And by magic wand would appear a chocolate!

Sweet tooth child don’t ask for one more, he would say
There are more to give, all the children coming my way.

In the steams whistle his words would fly like a song
In the afternoon’s shadow an old man gone wild
Sweetening his void with the joy of a child
One more still many more before he was free
His day was done and pocket empty!

Whenever I unwrap a chocolate
Grandpa Shil comes back to say

*Stop before you put it in mouth
There’s a child coming your way.

Some books I have never opened once
Within the wood can hear them sigh
If you had in mind not to give us a chance
Why at all us did you buy?

The books I read lying in the wooden case
Read once and that was enough
They too show quite a long face
Seem to say we’re forgotten stuff!

There are books behind the dusty glass
That found my head too hard to penetrate
The minds that wrote though of high class
Couldn’t reach me having spent all the sweat!

Some books came like love at first sight
I fell for them like a blind lover
When opened the first page found nothing right
Soon my romance with them was over!

Books are like women fast infatuate
Give the feel without them is no life
Yet they fade at too fast a rate
Only a few holding on like my wife.

They went inside the temple to worship
some ran in for shelter

when the clouds parted

*I drenched myself in the rain.

you say put on your specs papa
you don't see the screen
you don't see the page
don't seem to see anything these days

come boy when you are my age
you don't need to see the screen
you don't need to see the page
for they're by now all
tilled
filled
spilled
and you say to yourself
son I don't need no spec
for them now I can make remake
after countless read countless write
this mind tell me
I need no sight
for outside it's all empty
and inside
they deeply hide!

son when you tell me
I don't mind
for surely the times
would make you find
with all planted within
you wouldn't need to see the screen
see the page
*when a father of my age!

the dayend corpse of me
touched by the sunlight
is reborn a baby.

thus each morn
defying finality of death
in hopes wild
opens eyes a child.

he sees no death
in renewed faith
finds revival.

all pains aside
retakes the ride
of survival.

What not to want

ah, Rose, in deep breath
a thousand times
one secret door unlocked in my heart
a thousand times in deep breath
in each inhale heaven's aroma
you stoked my want of wants
the need of all my needs
to know **what not to want
four words and one line
to remind me what's not mine
mine never could be
learned after fake encounters
deep cuts and lasting scars
diminished for what's not mine
never could be
yet passed through fire
scathed burnt metamorphosed
till learned the truth
in just four words
one line
what not to want
that once known
a knowledge worthwhile
makes easier
the remaining miles.

His voice cracks in the thunder’s peal
My ego failed me in life’s each deal
Never did see what the other saw
Too blind to notice my own flaw!

In the candlelight his face wears a gloom
Two tremulous shadows darken the room
Forever I felt the world is for me
My viewpoints matter only!

Like a deluge pours the thunderous rain
In deafening din rattling windowpane
Focused only me only tried to get
***** in void now when egos abate!

Flickers a grave loss in his dulled eyes
Unshackled from self its obdurate disguise
*Over the ruins of ego is born in me the belief
The reward is not in the getting but lies in all our give!

His feet washed in the breaking waves
stands the faceless recorder of memories.
As glistens clean
seawashed skins of honeymooners
he waits for one call
to preserve those moments
only if when the tides fall
later years would recall
from the prints of that time
shadows of a yore
of being together on the seashore!

Don't venture too far he whispers
none can fathom high tide's curse
before is lived one lovely day
monsters from deep carry you away.

Don't venture beyond help
he mutters as if to himself
*if only you knew awaits what burn
when spend yourself the tides turn!

Don't go lovers too deep
I too drowned in faith's leap
with faith in love rode tide high
in the sands buried those dreams lie!

In the undergrowth beside the railway track
ants live in a world their own
the whistling trains run past to be back
leave trails of dust wind borne.

They have a dream when nights come
past day's frenzied task
strings of hope the fireflies strum
breaking out of the cocooned husk!

In those nights when full moon bloom
the limbs of ants shun rest
shed all pains rise up from gloom
they dig in mind's harvest.

Lines of them come out of hole
forget all diurnal scar
dance tango each midnight soul
watched by the heaven's star.

In those nights if you pass by them
tread the grass where silence reigns
can feel the stir of passion's flame
in the wind joy's lilting strain.

Every night he knocks at her door
Calls I’m hollow without it
Give me back want nothing more
The love I left at your feet.

Beside her is heard the snore
From her man in slumber’s bliss
The lover’s plea to settle the score
Doesn’t break his dreamful peace!

Give me my love the lover howls
Bereft it I’m dead
Echo him the barnyard’s owls
Heart dies when not love fed.

I’ll not come back once
Am ready for an honest pact
Open the door give me a chance
Return my love intact.

She alone hears her lover past
Sinks in her bed in fright
The jilted lover in lost love’s lust
Comes back on her door each night!

In the worst of days
I make for me
A make-believe mood!*

When within a storm rages
The heart is laden with charcoal tar
One by one I fill up the pages
That twinkle in make-believe’s borrowed star!

What magic can do a changed hair style
When I walk the darkest mile
It shows in the mirror a new look me
Contented to be make-believe happy!

A make-believe man not let the world know
All the pains inside morale low
Even once show not entrails crude
But spread in air make-believe mood!

In make-believe cheers when I hum a tune
It blunts the agony makes me feel immune
Miraculously comes back a feel real good
Saves the worst of days the make-believe mood!

as you wake up each gifted day
you hear within a voice to you say
all that's hidden unknown untold
would lay bare gradually unfold!

a day is not just some hours' spend
have turns and twists at each bend
comes your way without a hint
smiles of joy sadness' dark tint!

you may be down or in high spirit
show your strength or lose your grit
may happen things to **** your cheers
brakes of failures to bring you to tears!

a day may break or make you peace
make pursuit of happiness a hit and miss
may turn not the way you want it to be
in colorful plumes like a bird carefree!

but then you know in whatever shade
a day is like temptation irresistibly spread
we have to walk in and inescapably yield
till they all walk out when our life is stilled!

Hunger is gnawing your stomach
The time when food is must
Don’t let in your faith a crack
One breach in your trust!

It’s there for you to eat
Away by an inch a peck
In haste don’t call it quit
Be not afraid of your neck!

Beckons you the golden cheese
Bowel’s curing remedy
It waits for your final wish
To be set from hunger free!

A little pull is all you need
Just a little force
Howling hunger needs the feed
You have no other recourse!

Come mouse got nothing to lose
You’re hungry or you’re dead
Either way hangs the noose
your escape is that way made!

How him I envy

at age of ninety
he cries like a baby!

It needs not much of a provocation
without a cloud his tears flow
wind's rustle a known birdsong
half moon's glow
bell's ding-****
never ever his overgrown years
made the choice of stopping the tears!

I wanna know in what treasured gain
falls easy eye's undrying rain
leaves' wintry fall time rusted tale
chiming clock rosebud's smell
never held back tears
his ninety years!

In tears never miserly

*he cries like a baby!

I met her just once

still in my heart she shines
in this mind bred in the city
grinded in urban complexity
she is one finger pointing the firmament
I never though made her a commitment!

With women have spent oceans of word
with her stayed ten minutes or so
what in me she stirred
lifetime in my mind would glow!

Can someone tell me the mystery of emotion
that makes what's seen in one seen in none
love's ten minutes' silent revolution
in a span of life is never undone!

I met her once only
finger counted moments awhile shared
in my thoughts she remains heavenly
her memory brighter time weathered!

She leaves a scent for me when away.

On those lonely nights I take her to bed
Taste the nectars of her womanhood
Till I’m all over her vermillioned head!

Hear her heartbeat in sleepless night’s crumpled sheet
Re-spinning fantasies of wild dances long forgotten
And I gasp in that ecstatic rise and fall in unbearable pain
Melting me into her onto her inescapably besotten!

She leaves a scent for me when away.

She takes me to the bed with her
On her forehead a moonbeamed star
Burning me like newly wed!

*A woman never fades even on the empty bed.

There's no way I could justify
any of the failed loves.

They only demanded from me

a little more strength
some more endurance
walk a longer length

but when close to the peak
my knees grew weak
doubts brewed in my head
my resolves started to fade
I was seeking more precision
more commitment from the other side

and what happened was no doubt
their obvious fallout

a retreat when it would have been right
to in love scale the needed height.

Then as a cover up of my shame
tainted the other with all blame
last nail in the coffin being
hold her responsible for everything
then solaced in escape's upbeat mood
saying what happened happened for good!

Now I have to admit *****-nilly
my lapses in love come back to haunt me.

I come out no stronger
when a poem is all over.

come down to earth on broken wing
words gone dry heart bleeding
with me not even making a beginning!

When a poem is done
it tells me
you've not yet begun
not done your part
and still stuck at the start!

I come out no stronger
when a poem is over.

the mind for sometimes hover
falls down with broken wing
words gone dry heart bleeding
with me not even making a beginning!

When a poem is done
it tells me
I'm left undone
mere ink on paper without a soul,
when one more dream of mine you stole.

Don’t come to the cemetery at night* Peter Xalxo would say
If you are so inclined make your visits in the day
For often in the evening when exam worries were gone
I would go to the cemetery and sit on some tombstone.

I think boy the ones from the other world make visits at nights
And they would not love to find living souls upon their sights
Why intrude their peaceful home and not leave them there alone
When the time after the sunset they think to exclusively own!

Having said this with a grave face he would lower his voice still low
While on nightly posts at the graves I’ve seen in the dark some glow
And at moonlit nights on duty’s round heard footsteps around me
I would advise boy not to step into at night at the cemetery.

He used to tell more such tales to instill in the boy some fear
But come the next evening and at the cemetery I would reappear
For I loved the moon bathed solitude the trees’ darkened shed
The tranquility of the place in quiet company of the dead!

All said I wouldn’t leave out in this account one truthful fact
Uncle Peter’s stories had some effect some impact
They colored my times at the cemetery spent at nights alone
I seemed to feel they were moving the graves’ marble stone.

Then one night as I was coming out around nine o’clock
To my horror found the gate closed with an iron lock
Bewildered I stood there knowing no other ways to go
When there appeared a shadow heard the voice of Peter Xalxo.

I told you boy not to loiter here not disturb their peace of night
This ground here the dead walks now though beyond your sight
Run home and never come back his voice in whisper talked
Some more words he mumbled before got the gate unlocked.

That night at the dinner table my father told mom this
He was such a good man and a great friend to miss
But God only decides in his garden which flower to pluck
Peter Xalxo died this evening suffered a heart attack.

what from my own kind I hide,

in strangers confide!