The crickets chirp
and the toy dog has stopped barking
It's time for the 1:00 a.m. assessment of what is and what can be

The total darkness as I lie in bed is interrupted subtly by the faint silhouette of the ceiling fan
And I keep thinking of all that has passed and all that is yet to come and I feel unfulfilled

John Lennon once said that life is what happens as you're making plans for life, and the road map that I had at a much younger age is not my present reality

I cannot undo what is done but maybe I can commence a new path cognizant of physical emotional and mental limitations but limitless within that frame

And who knows maybe in a few months as I lie down in bed at 1:00 a.m. I'll be chirping along with the crickets.

Sipping wine in the backyard
The chilly air touches my skin
The distant sound of traffic
Shatters my oneness with being
The hum of civilization
Rudely interrupts my pact with nature

And I remember
I remember the carefree child
Unburdened by yesterday's sorrows
or tomorrow's worries
Kicking a ball on a dirt field

And I reach out my hand
Will he remember me?
For I never forgot you
Please remember me

I am
In a word
transfixed to a moment
the epitome of evolution
the pinnacle of creation
I laugh triumphantly
As my knife pierces the medium rare steak
So civilized

I am
that rare breeze
that has traveled the distance
of so many sorrows
a physical force
borne of the contradiction
between warmth and the abyss

I am
very respected
I adjust the tie
the trapezoidal patterns hide so coolly
the noose around my neck
a lynching of estimation
in a two part drama

I am
leaning against the wall
the flesh pressed against the graffiti
my being transposed against someone else's thoughts
its all a happenstance
an accidental meeting without a gaze
but for that commonality
we have nothing in common

I am
a synapse
I pass on the sensations
of pain and pleasure
without discrimination
my free will
in all its glory
succumbs to a chemical reaction
yet I must be more
or maybe just maybe
the knife I hold can pierce more than flesh

I am
floating on a stationary platform
I choose my destiny
I rearrange the order of confusion
a train screeches to a halt
a sea of ties and heels
self assured smiles
of the precise menu
may I have the check please

I am
a random canopy of emotion
I flutter in the breeze
the clearest expression of being
of breathing
of wanting
of feeling
a rare glimpse
a subtle smile
a delicate touch of flesh against flesh
its all too fleeting
transparency and no more

On these parallel blue lines, I'll make hand movements, which will be typed and stored on my laptop, in a random looking sequence of 0's and 1's.

The smell of daisies
The laments of crazies
Catch me in a daze
Deviate your gaze
From a rat in a maze
What should not phase
Standing in a haze
And inhaling the elixir of illusion.

without you, I see forms
with you, I see a face

without you, I see a line
with you, I see a circle

without you, I see a shade
with you, I see the color

without you, my diaphragm moves
with you, I breathe


without you, I see a flicker
with you, I see the stars


without you, I eat
with you, I savor

without you, I lie down
alone with my demons
I stare at a point on the ceiling
I imagine your head
resting on my diaphragm
and moving slowly
as I breathe