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Lexa May 2020
Some days
writing feels like
a trek up Kilimanjaro
Lexa May 2020
I ended it for a reason.
I made my decision.
So why can I not shake you?
Lexa Apr 2020
hopelessly for an olive branch,
a smoke signal, a message in a bottle,
anything.  But instead, I resigned
to meeting you in my fantasies.

You, my muse, subject of
immeasurable writings, fixation of
endless daydreams, despite miles
between, years in the rearview,

an heirloom, rich and magnificent,
haphazardly tossed away, regretfully
discarded, a soaring balloon above,
me with nostalgia for a life now foreign.

Daringly the storm stirred, I the boat
rocking in your strong gale, make believe
winds replaced by the absolute, you,
the genie, made my dreams come true.

Together we danced the stranger shuffle,
shakey steps, dubious dos-à-dos, synergy
once had forgotten, muscle memory curtailed,
trying each other on like a new pair of shoes.

Brash beginnings lead to hasty endings.
I can only guess why you fleetingly flickered
in a now cameo role leaving me to recreate and
reminisce, wondering if you will return again.
Lexa Apr 2020
Lifting head from pillow,
eyes fluttering open,
sun shining in, presenting
a new cycle of choices

like sitting down for coffee
at the downtown diner
and selecting sweet or savory
to accompany,

or whether to wear blue or green,
heels or flats, skirt or pants,
to take a lunch or venture out,
a detour to the gym or the couch.

Bestowing others with kindness,
trying on tolerance or
looking down from your wobbly
pedestal, it’s yours for the taking.

To love your spouse or find fault,
to find the similarities or seek out
the differences, showing up with
love is yours to choose.
Lexa Apr 2020
A bud in each ear, I walked
through snow, through rain,
across the green, across the streets
head down, gazing at the ground,
placing one foot in front of the other.
Some days, there was no sound,
no need, the effect was the same,
an excuse not to engage,
a license to be ignored,
a semblance of normalcy
where I didn’t have to feel
like the outsider I was.
I could choose to play that role
instead.
Lexa Apr 2020
Sit still, little soul,
tune into the cries
of your heart.
Time can never
be replenished;
it’s yours for the
taking, and it’s
yours for the
Wasting.  So use
each minute as
you want.  Don’t
let the pressures
of society steal
away your most
valuable asset.
Lexa Apr 2020
I hate myself when
I unleash the rage of a
roaring lioness.

When I hate myself,
my fangs and claws again show.
So the cycle goes.
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