Pain chose me, now I choose it.
I'm dying, but don't reach out.
I know I am.
I'm choosing it.
Everyday it hurts.
It hurts so bad.
The pain of relief hurts the most.
Because that builds hope that maybe I won't hurt.
But I do.
I will.
But I'm not running from it,
I run towards it.
I no longer pick up the pieces that have cracked off.
I stand on them.
Let the ghost of myself hurt me too.
Knowing that one version of me would hate the current me.
I don't care how much blood I lose,
I'll feed myself to your beautiful petals as your thorns slit my wrists.
I won't wilt away,
You'd hate that.
No instead I'll die with a smile,
One that won't drop because then you'd know the love you have for me is just love for a corpse.
I don't choose me.
I choose pain.
So bring it on.
I'll hurt so long as you never frown.
May 23
May 23, 2026 at 5:54 PM UTC
Pain chose me, now I choose it.
I'm dying, but don't reach out.
I know I am.
I'm choosing it.
Everyday it hurts.
It hurts so bad.
The pain of relief hurts the most.
Because that builds hope that maybe I won't hurt.
But I do.
I will.
But I'm not running from it,
I run towards it.
I no longer pick up the pieces that have cracked off.
I stand on them.
Let the ghost of myself hurt me too.
Knowing that one version of me would hate the current me.
I don't care how much blood I lose,
I'll feed myself to your beautiful petals as your thorns slit my wrists.
I won't wilt away,
You'd hate that.
No instead I'll die with a smile,
One that won't drop because then you'd know the love you have for me is just love for a corpse.
I don't choose me.
I choose pain.
So bring it on.
I'll hurt so long as you never frown.
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