When you asked to call, I knew
I had known deep in my soul it was coming
But that didn't make it hurt any less
I'm trying to survive on a hope that everyone tells me is
right around the corner
But what about the hope down the stairs
I can't manage to push away these thoughts
I felt I had purpose, even if it was hard sometimes
Now I feel stuck in the ghost of you
You don't seem okay, but neither do I
I compare our reactions like it means something
I loved you more, I cared more, I gave more
My friends are sick of hearing it
The doctors won't let me drown it in pills
I'm just trying to finish high school, avoid getting myself killed
I take part in sabotaging behaviors
I look you up, stalk your socials
********** to the thought of us, then hit myself after
I told you I didn't want you to text me
I felt so in control in the moment
But once again, I am falling, and there is no end in sight
May 12
May 12, 2026 at 6:23 PM UTC
When you asked to call, I knew
I had known deep in my soul it was coming
But that didn't make it hurt any less
I'm trying to survive on a hope that everyone tells me is
right around the corner
But what about the hope down the stairs
I can't manage to push away these thoughts
I felt I had purpose, even if it was hard sometimes
Now I feel stuck in the ghost of you
You don't seem okay, but neither do I
I compare our reactions like it means something
I loved you more, I cared more, I gave more
My friends are sick of hearing it
The doctors won't let me drown it in pills
I'm just trying to finish high school, avoid getting myself killed
I take part in sabotaging behaviors
I look you up, stalk your socials
********** to the thought of us, then hit myself after
I told you I didn't want you to text me
I felt so in control in the moment
But once again, I am falling, and there is no end in sight
Fresh out of a breakup, more to come
Request permission to use this poem