Remember the feeling
of emptiness
and shame
how you hope
nobody calls your name
becuase you
are so **** drained.
when you look back
at the night you had..
hardly a pause
clenched jaw
night gone wrong.
wish i would have stayed
but i was easily swayed
shoulda just kicked back
relaxed - felt glad
me - the cat
doodles on the scratchpad
as i look at yesterday
i was a nonstop talking train
vasonconstriction
hardly a listen
rigid in every limb
muscle strain
anxiety took over my brain,
But, choice was made.
Nothing less.
Take a breath.
Today?
Regret, emberassment, shame
whats the point in hating ourselves
for mistakes
what matters
is we strive to be a little better
than we were yesterday.
----
my life isnt a movie.
im not making a play.
this isn't a a game
i will paint
a beautiful landscape
i can maintain
no more tug of war
we are on the same same page
my heart - my brain
actions
put in place
happy new year
for may everything
change.
my insides
are not the same
im ready to become
to be in unison
to reach the sun
to feel important.
i will do things in fright
do it alone
work all night
ill love myself
with no souls in sight
do the things i dont want to do
but what i need to.
instant gratifications
should be delayed
its the actions
dedications
that will pay.
i am flipping a new page
Jan 10
Jan 10, 2026 at 9:22 PM UTC
Remember the feeling
of emptiness
and shame
how you hope
nobody calls your name
becuase you
are so **** drained.
when you look back
at the night you had..
hardly a pause
clenched jaw
night gone wrong.
wish i would have stayed
but i was easily swayed
shoulda just kicked back
relaxed - felt glad
me - the cat
doodles on the scratchpad
as i look at yesterday
i was a nonstop talking train
vasonconstriction
hardly a listen
rigid in every limb
muscle strain
anxiety took over my brain,
But, choice was made.
Nothing less.
Take a breath.
Today?
Regret, emberassment, shame
whats the point in hating ourselves
for mistakes
what matters
is we strive to be a little better
than we were yesterday.
----
my life isnt a movie.
im not making a play.
this isn't a a game
i will paint
a beautiful landscape
i can maintain
no more tug of war
we are on the same same page
my heart - my brain
actions
put in place
happy new year
for may everything
change.
my insides
are not the same
im ready to become
to be in unison
to reach the sun
to feel important.
i will do things in fright
do it alone
work all night
ill love myself
with no souls in sight
do the things i dont want to do
but what i need to.
instant gratifications
should be delayed
its the actions
dedications
that will pay.
i am flipping a new page
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