Everyone says I’m lucky.
Seventeen.
Whole life ahead of me like a hallway
with too many doors.
My grades are fine.
My parents aren’t yelling.
I’ve got friends, plans for Friday,
a phone that lights up when I check it.
Nothing’s wrong enough to complain about.
That’s what I tell myself
when my chest feels tight for no reason
in the middle of math class.
I laugh loud in the cafeteria.
I post like I’m supposed to.
I know all the right answers
except why I feel empty
when I’m not supposed to.
Adults say this is the best time.
No real problems yet.
But every night my thoughts get heavy,
like they’re trying to grow up faster than me.
I feel guilty for feeling bad.
Like I’m wasting something important.
Like happiness is a class
I’m skipping on purpose.
I don’t want anything terrible to happen.
I don’t want attention.
I just want to understand
why being okay feels so exhausting.
Everything’s good.
That’s the problem.
Because if this is fine,
why do I still feel like
I’m failing at being seventeen?
Jan 8
Jan 8, 2026 at 1:06 PM UTC
Everyone says I’m lucky.
Seventeen.
Whole life ahead of me like a hallway
with too many doors.
My grades are fine.
My parents aren’t yelling.
I’ve got friends, plans for Friday,
a phone that lights up when I check it.
Nothing’s wrong enough to complain about.
That’s what I tell myself
when my chest feels tight for no reason
in the middle of math class.
I laugh loud in the cafeteria.
I post like I’m supposed to.
I know all the right answers
except why I feel empty
when I’m not supposed to.
Adults say this is the best time.
No real problems yet.
But every night my thoughts get heavy,
like they’re trying to grow up faster than me.
I feel guilty for feeling bad.
Like I’m wasting something important.
Like happiness is a class
I’m skipping on purpose.
I don’t want anything terrible to happen.
I don’t want attention.
I just want to understand
why being okay feels so exhausting.
Everything’s good.
That’s the problem.
Because if this is fine,
why do I still feel like
I’m failing at being seventeen?
Good life, Empty Heart.
