I wish I could be free,
like a leaf on a tree, falling to the ground
I wish I could drift away in the wind
far away from the depts of my pain
The bruises of knowing that this terror won’t rest
sends my brain into fury, my mind a complete mess
The outside world frightens me, I’m not brave, I’m not strong
I’m lost, I just want to be free
This web of fear ignites my thoughts
constant, oppressive, it won’t stop it just haunts
My daily life torn apart by myself
submerged into darkness, consumed by my health
As I lie awake at 2am,
because I lost the ability to sleep
Racing feelings twist and turn around my head
I worn, I’m tired, I’m just full of dread
You can’t run, you can’t hide
You’re always a step behind
the panic that builds within my body
I’m drowning, you just can’t see it
I feel invisible sometimes, completely isolated
like the silence will never end
I don’t think I can escape
I’m to far gone to mend
I’m overwhelmed and worthless
I can’t do anything right
I want to escape, hide away
I don’t deserve to the see the light
I wonder constantly what people think of me,
What they say about me
My heart is in my throat, it’s too hard to breathe
All I want is to disappear, I’m not allowed to be free
I overthink every word, every action I question
This demon living inside my head, fuels my depression
I’m vulnerable, alone, a failure, a fake
All I’m good at is making stupid mistakes
This is anxiety at its worst
next time you presume I fine
Take a minute to understand
that inside I’m fighting the eternal curse
I live with the hope that I will get better
That this fear inside will not last forever
Oct 23, 2017
Oct 23, 2017 at 11:47 AM UTC
I wish I could be free,
like a leaf on a tree, falling to the ground
I wish I could drift away in the wind
far away from the depts of my pain
The bruises of knowing that this terror won’t rest
sends my brain into fury, my mind a complete mess
The outside world frightens me, I’m not brave, I’m not strong
I’m lost, I just want to be free
This web of fear ignites my thoughts
constant, oppressive, it won’t stop it just haunts
My daily life torn apart by myself
submerged into darkness, consumed by my health
As I lie awake at 2am,
because I lost the ability to sleep
Racing feelings twist and turn around my head
I worn, I’m tired, I’m just full of dread
You can’t run, you can’t hide
You’re always a step behind
the panic that builds within my body
I’m drowning, you just can’t see it
I feel invisible sometimes, completely isolated
like the silence will never end
I don’t think I can escape
I’m to far gone to mend
I’m overwhelmed and worthless
I can’t do anything right
I want to escape, hide away
I don’t deserve to the see the light
I wonder constantly what people think of me,
What they say about me
My heart is in my throat, it’s too hard to breathe
All I want is to disappear, I’m not allowed to be free
I overthink every word, every action I question
This demon living inside my head, fuels my depression
I’m vulnerable, alone, a failure, a fake
All I’m good at is making stupid mistakes
This is anxiety at its worst
next time you presume I fine
Take a minute to understand
that inside I’m fighting the eternal curse
I live with the hope that I will get better
That this fear inside will not last forever
Writing is really beginning to have a positive affect on my mental health!
Request permission to use this poem