have you ever
taken your hair
out of a towel and found
it completely dry?
me
neither.
the odd part is
i don't hate life
i only hate who
it's made me out to be
how when i'm simmering
in a soupy soapy bath of
eucalyptus and hot water
i can see my body so clearly
see everything i despise
so clearly
*(on second thought
it's only the things i
love about myself that
never come into focus.)*
i can't stand how when
i'm sad the tiniest things
feel like malicious jabs
to my stomach
i could feel it
the panic attack
waiting for me
lurking behind
my heavy eyelids
scratchy jeans
mustard sleeves
funeral apron
polyethylene
under my skin.
*(i'm sorry if you think
i'm not listening
because chances are
that i'm not
it's not anything
personal
it's just that i live so
completely in my own
head that i occasionally
forget what's going on)*
last night before
i fell asleep i gave
the thoughts in my head
names and personalities
let them speak in their
own original voices.
*(of course in the
morning i'd
forgotten the details
but they're still up there)*
i keep seeing people
who i don't want to talk to
a sick side effect of
leaving the house
if there's anything i'm not
it's bulletproof in an apron
right in the head
or relaxed in a bath.
Aug 22, 2016
Aug 22, 2016 at 11:07 PM UTC
have you ever
taken your hair
out of a towel and found
it completely dry?
me
neither.
the odd part is
i don't hate life
i only hate who
it's made me out to be
how when i'm simmering
in a soupy soapy bath of
eucalyptus and hot water
i can see my body so clearly
see everything i despise
so clearly
*(on second thought
it's only the things i
love about myself that
never come into focus.)*
i can't stand how when
i'm sad the tiniest things
feel like malicious jabs
to my stomach
i could feel it
the panic attack
waiting for me
lurking behind
my heavy eyelids
scratchy jeans
mustard sleeves
funeral apron
polyethylene
under my skin.
*(i'm sorry if you think
i'm not listening
because chances are
that i'm not
it's not anything
personal
it's just that i live so
completely in my own
head that i occasionally
forget what's going on)*
last night before
i fell asleep i gave
the thoughts in my head
names and personalities
let them speak in their
own original voices.
*(of course in the
morning i'd
forgotten the details
but they're still up there)*
i keep seeing people
who i don't want to talk to
a sick side effect of
leaving the house
if there's anything i'm not
it's bulletproof in an apron
right in the head
or relaxed in a bath.
Copyright 7/29/16 by B. E. McComb