I regret sleeping on that couch. I was never very good at sleeping alone, and sleeping on that couch only made it worse. Maybe that's why I clutch my pillow at night like my life depends on it.
A pounding headache is all I'm left with while my battered soul still remains there on that couch. But it's time that I take it back. It's time that I make a trade. An eye for an eye, they always say.
So its time that I step out of my perfect fantasy and face reality, because I've become a ****** human being from searching for perfection and love. We all know we can't obtain it. I created my own hell, building blocks made out of self loathing, self pity, anger, the list goes on and on. But every hell must freeze over.
That couch I slept on? It's in my own mind, residing in the hell I created, smack in the middle of the thousands of hands that grab and choke and claw. It's right in the middle of my inner demons.
I may still be sad in the morning, if I wake up... But I'll sleep better knowing that I accepted the past. Even if I still regret sleeping on that couch.
So, Now I lay me down to sleep, I know that my soul is mine to keep. But if I should die before I wake, I know that all of my struggles were not a mistake.