The blue lines of the pieces of paper I wrote my deepest secrets on haunts me in my dreams. I stare at it blankly as it mocks me, spitting my words in my face as if it were poison I can't do anything about this pain but maybe if I were empty things would change and what about the deep dark secrets that laugh at me until I'm crying and how will I ever move past the guilt of your neck snapping as you hung yourself and where will I go when I have no one left and when will this emptiness subside how will I get out of the darkness and who will I turn to when I'm nearly drowning when will it stop will it ever stop who will stop it I want to meet them and thank them and ask them to make it stop sooner please make it stop this hurts it hurts and how could it not because I'm me and the guilt I feel that haunts my dreams is all I'll ever feel and this is the only me I'll ever know and maybe someone else will know another me but I will only know this one and maybe thats a good thing but maybe it's a tragedy.