With bow in hand
Arrows in my quiver
(After a night in camp
Doing much damage to my liver)

I set out
To stalk my prey
Hoping not to return
Empty handed today

I found my spot
And stopped to listen
As the early morning sun
On the leaves did glisten

Then what to my wondering
Eyes did appear?
Yep you guessed it
A group of eight deer

Slowly and quietly
I drew back my bow
Took careful aim
And let the string go

The arrow found it's mark
A deer hit the ground
As the others ran
So quickly off they did bound

After a few moments
I went to claim my prize
Only to see a shiney red nose
Beneath the now dead eyes

"Oh well" I thought
"I guess it'll taste the same"
So after field dressing
I loaded up my game

Then a fat man
Came crashing through the brush
Coming at me full throttle
A true *** rush

He was dressed all in red
With a solid white beard
Not sure who he was
But he certainly looked weird

Well I took off
At a full run
Not sure what he intended
But guessing it wouldn't be fun

Not sure if you've ever ran
Carrying a deer
But I was desperate
To not let the fat man get near

After awhile
He gave up the pursuit
I got to my truck
Loaded the deer and did scoot

I have to tell ya
That was the best deer I have ate
But something else about it
Truly too is great

I mounted the head
Where I sleep at night
And as I read in bed
That nose casts a perfect light.