I dream of another life, please don't wake me up
I'm sick of dealing with the ironic hatred of love
and the hatred of me, because I hate what I see
and they say you can change but it's not physical, it's me

I pray for motivation, I want to be someone to admire
but my mind is burning me, please put out the fire
and I keep running in circles, please stab this tire
I am programmed to fail, please rewire

I want to pull the plug on my mind,
hope it doesn't reboot, but each time I try
it does not compute, so I'm trapped in a box
it just learns to defy, I just want to die

but I don't at the same time,
I get sad and ******* stupid
so I bleed these sad rhymes
I bleed these sad rhymes
and I keep bleeding
every second I breathe
the more my minds feeding
on me sad, wanting to stop breathing
this hatred inside just won't stop breeding
so a seedling is planted and the anxiety grows
no happy ending for me as far as the storybook knows
I'm always ******* sad and it really goes to show
they don't know how I feel
it really goes to show
and I don't even know me anymore

who am I?

no one you want to know
I'll infect you with my problems
until you want to go

I guess it's fall
my tree of friends are leaving
I am no widower, but I'm still grieving

what do I want?
no more feelings