I don't like this anymore
I forfeit my facade
I am petrified and scrambling for sense
Stability's lost confidence
Steadily realized,
The cold won't go away this time
The cold has come to stay for a while
How will I remain sane?
How will I collect myself, again?
How can I promise myself I'll get through it, again?
How can I promise myself I won't do it, again?
The cold has come to haunt me as I dare try to sleep it out
Interrupted by the chill,
Stopped in my tracks, as if menacingly whispering,
"Did you think you were going somewhere?"
Dropping me to the floor with the breaking nostalgia like
"Did you think this would be easy just because it's a different year?"
And I act like I can't remember
When I thought I wouldn't make it through December
Cursing myself as if I'd done something wrong
Or felt something wrong
I'd rather curse myself and get it right
than her curse me, and falter to her knees
Again
What kind of coward am I
That Winter scares me?
Terrifies me?
What am I?
I don't like this anymore.