im holding a cigarette
between my fingers
conflicting with myself
with you behind me
pressing me to take
one small puff.
hearing such poisonous words
escape past your lips
is merely a privilege
to be able to swim in your caramel voice.
your death rattle laugh
entices me
to come closer
to entrap me in your chess board games.
I have been warned
about people like you
by my mother
ever since I was a little girl
that people like you
would lead me to my own down fall.
yet here I am
you always pushing me closer
to death's hands
making me excited
that you would lavish me
with your attention.
hands at the back of my mind
are reaching out
for what's left of my common sense
while small minerals are abducted
by my sharp intake of oxygen
and a wave of carbonated silk
washes over my coarse throat.
all to impress you
after I fell into your deep eyes
after I found out how addicting your presence could be
after I took
one small puff.