i always believed i was someone different.

someone who actually knew. the snowflakes
fall into my eyes
for a moment, i'm blinded.

i thought i knew the roads. the tricks.
the questions. the barriers.

i'm crumbling, still. i'm weak.

did i never grow strong?

i thought i knew.

knew that pain was inevitable.

i thought i knew.

you're not always the first choice.

i thought i knew.

you don't get what you want.

so if i throw my hands up and scream
who would even listen? i'm trapped in
an unknown element
uncomfortable and i feel hands on me
i'm trying to protect myself
because i thought i knew
everything that already needed to
be known.

the snow twirls around me
and i realize.
this snow is new.
wild. raging.
i know nothing. i'm naive.
it blows until i fall.

i'm stupid. snowflakes are unique.

i'm a girl who knows absolutely
nothing.

except.

that this snow will keep falling.