Silence, some times its welcomed; simply to hear the hum of the computers, the sound of footsteps outside, opening and closing doors...But after a while it gets lonesome. You sit in silence and wonder why its still there. You try to fill it, try to find any and every possible noise to make the silence go away. The clicking of your fingers, the ringing of your cellphone, the roar of the music you play absently from the computer.



Silence, sometimes its welcomed; the gate way to new ideas, of thoughts you'd never hear, visions racing past your eyes as you close them in appreciation...But after a while your thoughts run away with out you, you start to think twice, double guess, hurt yourself. You try everything you can to calm the thoughts that make you paranoid simply to make life slow down, make sense, to understand.



Silence, sometimes its welcomed; but not today. I don't want to be alone, I DON'T want to sit in silence and feel forgotten. But what else to do? Listen to the blaring of the music, think of random ideas and write, fill the silence with my coughs from this sickness and hope it will get better soon. I can't help but think of all I still have to do and how I can't do it ill, I think of the guilt i feel for calling out of work BECAUSE i am sick, I think of how I let myself be used to keep from feeling guilty...and end up killing myself in the end. I am sick because i work to hard, I work to hard because i am sick and need to catch up. How does this help?



Silence, sometimes it is welcomed; right now i would willingly break my ears to stop hearing the voices in my head telling me to stop thinking, to continue to be horrid to myself, to stop complaining, and to sit still. I don't want to. I hate them. Music blare to i DON'T have to hear them.



Silence, sometimes it is welcomed.......