Maybe I am disaster
Loss seems to fill me up and
doesn't it, to everyone though?
Aren't we all just floating?
Everyone tells me that I don’t need another person because I am complete
I fill myself
So why the **** do I feel so empty?
Why am I lonely?
Maybe I am disaster
But am I that beautiful kind of disaster
That wanted kind of disaster
How do I open the skies
And hug the ones I've lost?
Maybe regret is the worst kind of poison
Maybe it kills
How do I live the way I want to without other people?
I have spent 17 years not hugging other people
And I think I know why
I am so frightened of intimacy
So scared
Why would any reasonable person give others bits of their souls?
Can you trust?
Can you trust?
What is trust?
How do I grow?
How do I empty my cocoon?
I know who I am because I say what I am
But how do I convince others
I am wanted?
Am I wanted?
I don’t know any more