The exhaustion hurts
but not as bad as you
when you’re whittling away at my bones
telling me, ‘it’s almost over’
‘you’re so strong’
‘stick in there’

News flash:
it’s no longer sticking in there
when all you are is stuck
in a choice between something that
could be worth it
or throwing it all away for pride

Pride
something I never knew I had
before you
something you taught me
in the way that you lived
the way that you smiled
the way that you laughed
moved, stood, felt

Confidence flowed through you
like it was in some special air you breathed
you amazed me
inspired me, saved me

And I thought that talking to you
would be a relief
but I quickly realized
talking to you doesn't mean I get you back

My heart is stuck sticking in there
because of the uncertainty of your journey
and the only way I could be sure you still love me
is by making sure you think I don't anymore

h.s.