Your not like the others, you're different, you're like me. I find myself smiling at simple things and laughing at others for no reason at all, because they make me think of you. Every time I consider being with you I bite my lip holding it all back, knowing whatever comes out of my mouth might ruin are friendship and I don't want to lose you. Unless you feel the same way about me. I find myself thinking about you, about being near you. I feel better when I'm with you; stronger. When I am near you I have that habit of mine, biting my lip and clenching my fist, trying to contain my feelings. Keep myself in control. When I'm not near you I can't help but think of you and wanting, waiting to see you again. I want to be wrapped in your arms feel your warmth. Just be near you. It's like I'm addicted to you, but I don't want to push you away, I can't lose you. People tell these words over and over to the ones they love the most and it's either failed them or made them happier, the words may seem old like you hear them every day, sometimes a lie, sometimes with purpose. But I promise I don't lie and I have a purpose, and I have reasons and there's something inside telling me "I love you" But my mind, my head, my stupid thoughts that I can't abandon tell me to let things stay the way they are, to not push it. I can't handle the pressure I haven't the patience. When I want you the most, when I feel my control, my focus slipping, like my heart is ready to explode and my stomach is bursting with butterflies, I don't go to you. I give us more space than before, I run and hide being more cautious and careful than before. No one must know my secrets. I'll wait for you, which is harder for me than you think. I'll wait even if you don't love me, like I love you... You, they, have no idea how much I want this, how much I need this, how much I need you. I hope the day when I lose control never sees the light.