Your hateful words lash out and cut me open wide
My heart is bleeding an unarmed, gaping laceration
You drink willingly from the drops of blood I’ve cried
I tirelessly try to search your dark eyes for reparation

Your smile let’s me know that you have found pleasure
You want to see me hurt and I have made it all so easy
In my heart your disrespect has been hidden like a treasure
Words of regret come so quick I know it’s to appease me

It is no accident that you are able to drain me of emotion
This pain is all I have ever seen and all that I have known
Without pain there is no understanding of devotion
So much in love with the performance I have deeply grown

You use sorry as a band-aide to patch the deepened scars
I have heard it so so many times throughout the years
Your words have wounded me like the numbers of stars
I see that you have become drunk thirsting for my tears

You play me like the marionette made of strings and bone
I dance around like a fool for you in my steely iron chains
I have a much greater fear of being so desperately alone
That I have erased any memory of strength that remains

The only thing that is missing is the violence in your hands
Although in time those scars will begin to slowly fade away
I much prefer the lasting pain that killing my soul demands
I can hold on much more tightly to the divisive words you say

In my silence you see weakness but I just don’t want to fight
I don’t understand love without pain that cuts me to the core
And while I cry because it still hurts, inside I love the spite
I must love it like no other thing; I keep coming back for more