The internal clock winds down another year Time keeps going by faster i fear How much longer am i supposed to be here That's not up for me to decide Or is it Who knows anymore Certainly not me Counted my birthdays on five year intervals with my fingers and toes I've ran out Twenty one years old still so very concerned with what life is about I'm wasting time Or am i Who knows anymore Am i still in my youth What little youth i had You tend to grow up very fast when self loathing thoughts are all you've ever had Praying to a god to relieve you of always being so sad Relative to everything that's happened in the past I cannot release this hot burning coal Its not as simple as letting things go