Sep 2014
Wandering the catacombs of my mind
With only a bit of red-tinged light
Unlit candle and flint in shaky hands
Dreading what I could see if it was bright
Dreading the monsters and bones I would find
The awful things that would be in sight
The skeletons of all my memories
The things that would paralyze me with fright
This fear is embedded deep in my mind
The fear of re-living life in full light
It's a miserable existence at best
To be afraid of my own inner light
My body is tired, this maze is not kind
There's places I could fall, from a great height
Clumsy feet, eyes drooping from lack of sleep
Nothing's more relaxing than red-tinged light
I can feel them waiting, the spirit-kind
Waiting to see if I deny the light
Or if I accept the pain it would bring
Do I choose to die, or live in fright?
With only a bit of red-tinged light
Unlit candle and flint in shaky hands
Dreading what I could see if it was bright
Dreading the monsters and bones I would find
The awful things that would be in sight
The skeletons of all my memories
The things that would paralyze me with fright
This fear is embedded deep in my mind
The fear of re-living life in full light
It's a miserable existence at best
To be afraid of my own inner light
My body is tired, this maze is not kind
There's places I could fall, from a great height
Clumsy feet, eyes drooping from lack of sleep
Nothing's more relaxing than red-tinged light
I can feel them waiting, the spirit-kind
Waiting to see if I deny the light
Or if I accept the pain it would bring
Do I choose to die, or live in fright?
Just some wanderings through my mind. Was thinking of my dead relatives and their last few minutes in their life, I figure this probably how my life will end. I will get older, I will get tierd, and because I'm stubborn as hell and hate being dependent on others I will probably take my own life. The question is when will I decide to stop living in fear of death and embrace it. Not for a couple more decades at least.
