I've done some dumb things in my life
thats one of the reasons there is no wife
too much talk of poo for women
all this pretty stupid grinning
need a kick up the *** real bad
or a pointy finger when I'm sad
set myself on fire because thats what I like
fell through the ice while riding my bike
ironed a shirt while I was wearing it
got a huge blister on my weeny ***
one day went fishing and got in a flap
caught a nice carp on a lump of cat crap
got my **** stuck in a cracked toilet seat
that took a lump out ooh painful but neat
said to the doctor" when I'm done yelling,
get rid of the pain, but please leave the swelling!"
one thing I do enjoy is a laugh
but that is no good for my epitaph
for a donkey like me my final hurrah
reads here lies Jeremy.... a ******* Too Far