she wiped away her
book quote tears
with her '98 Disney tshirt,
blaming it on the clouds,
the carousels that she feels in
*****,
blamed me for our candy floss kisses
and Polaroid memories.

I was the summer
she looked at as winter.

now hands freeze eyes and
eyes thaw roller-coaster hearts
until veins split, crack, splinter
over her bathroom floor
and fairground goldfish rust
as I call
for her name.