It’s all spinning in my head, burning with friction and fire. Your name is etched all on my lips, all crossed out with a scar. I’ve been trying to erase it, but it’s so strong I can taste it even now. I am so ashamed and so alone and maybe that’s why I can’t think of anything else. I am so high, I’m out of my mind, but I can’t come down. I’m unsure if your heart beats just as mine. I can’t say now but something’s brewing, boiling up with time. I ******* miss you and it is hurting every fiber of my being; I refuse to wonder why. I can’t come to terms with what’s lurking under my bed. I’m afraid that this is all in my head. I’m afraid that I’ll never see you again… if I tell you any of it. Because I know you’ll just blame me. Because it is not what we think or what we have, it is what we do. The choice is clear from you. I still miss you.