They expected you to be too much,
The funny, light hearted boy they always begged you to be,
So you gave in sacrificing the battles you
Hushed down deep in the pit of your stomach for a good laugh to create the mindful machine
To destroy the unspeakable Wars flowing in your veins.

And you still wonder why misfortunes are settling heavy on your thinning skeleton,
Forces so unbearable,
The coffee stains on your ill fitting t-shirt prove
That the sleepless nights have gotten the best of you.

Sleep doesn't come easy for those who can't let their worries go.

You blame the God you never took the time to understand,
He has always been the one who has filled you up to the edge of your mouth with
Hatred and Fire and Fear.

Oh, the fear is breaking your backbone,
Burning your every thought onto the next and the next and the next,
But when you drive your inconsistent thoughts and complaints down the throats of your parents, It has never felt so good.

Breaking them down to your level helps you breathe.
It eases you to darkening sleep,
Knowing they are worried just as much as you have always been.