poetry isn't just for white people, Vivian isn't a girl's name, and I will wear these white jeans past Labor Day. we forget that we could touch the stars if we ******* tried, but instead we are here, drowning in atmosphere, choking on our inhibitions. there are ten pills tucked in the very back of your desk; you love them but they're about to become a crutch, and you are frightened. I don't **** with that new ****, but it's not like you care. I'm still the same ******* idiot, total trash, I deleted your number and I won't send you snapchats, I wonder if you deleted my dickpics. lost intimacy, windowsill cacti, a Ziplock full of ******* stuffed inside your pillowcase; I went for a run, your name traipsing about my prefrontal cortex, smashing memories, beheading roosters, screaming incoherently about subprime mortgages and credit derivatives. the government is lying about 9/11 but no one really cares; the government is arming oppressive regimes in Missouri but white people don't care; would that I had such willful ignorance, the right to ignore the slaughter on our front lawns. my parents started from the bottom, they survived in America, decapitated birds on the doorstep. I do not have their strength and I am washing Xanax down with Gatorade and refusing to apologize.