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Aug 2014
As the rain is falling
from the cloudy sky,
my tears
remember that horrendous night
when you laid
your hands on me for the last time.
Did I do anything wrong?
I always loved you,
tried my best to be the perfect woman
you wanted me to be,
but yet,
you couldn't see.
How could you harm someone
that you say
you love someone so much?
The one who carries
your seed.
You've seen me shed
tears.
You were the only one that
I loved
throughout
the years.
But I can still picture
that ****** night,
how
arguments
always led to fist fights.
When you used to come home
late drunk,
smelling
like women's perfume.
Knowing that I was always home,
cleaning,
cooking you meals,
washing your clothes,
and carrying your child inside my womb.
But everything
was never like this;
At the beginning you were
so kind and sweet.
So sweet
that I used to sneak out of my house
so we could always meet;
with you, I lost my virginity.
You were my one and only.
While you went out
to strip clubs
with your friends,
I was home.
Always home,
always feeling lonely.
All the abuse,
all the bruises,
and all the name calling,
I still stayed with you
because
you would always
promised,
you always swore,
that you were gonna change
all smiling.

All my friends
used to tell me to get away from you,
to leave you,
because
you were never going
to change.
That you were still going
to do
what you always do.
But when I finally decided
to leave you,
I packed all of my
belongings
and tried to leave.
Trying to leave in a hurry
'cause I knew
that if you came home,
things would get
very ugly.
But that day
you came home early,
exactly at 7:30.
That's when everything
got worse:
you pulled my hair,
starting hitting me,
punching me,
even when you knew I was pregnant,
then you kicked me
in the stomach.
Blood started coming out.
You had no remorse.
You said that if I were
to leave you,
you were going to **** me.
That I was never going to be free
because
I was your property.
You ran to get your gun,
but as you left,
I ran to the kitchen and grabbed
a ***,
hid beside the door
and when you started looking for me,
yelling my name,
you walked in the kitchen
and I hit you
as hard as I could.
You fell to the ground
and dropped
your gun.
I grabbed the gun
as fast as I could
and tried to run,
but you got up fast and grabbed me
from the hair
and pushed me to the ground.
You tried
getting the gun back,
but then . .

BAM, BAM

(The sirens crying)

There was blood everywhere..
That night
was the end of that
horrendous
nightmare.

You were dead.
This is a true story,
it happened to my cousin Jennifer.
It took her a year
for the verdict to say
that she acted upon self-defense.

If you know anyone that's being
abused,
physically or verbally,
or you, yourself,
is being abused,
there's a hotline called
**The National Domestic Violence Hotline**
that you can call at anytime.

1-800-799-7233
Jaee Derbéssy
Written by
Jaee Derbéssy  nowhere, yet everywhere.
(nowhere, yet everywhere.)   
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