“Life is, at its core, a smattering of multicolor streaks and blotches on a knock-off Jackson ******* painting, don’t you think?” you say between impossibly tiny sips of your organic loose leaf herbal something-or-other tea— or at least I think that’s what you said; I was too distracted (by the general awfulness with which your incomprehensibly long nose hairs mingled with your bristly auburn mustache as elevated nonsense poured out of your speech-hole) to fully ingest your attempt at insightfulness.
But I reply: “Aren’t you saying that what you’re saying doesn’t matter anyway? Abstract expressionism, existentialism, nihilism, all that stuff? Life has no meaning—so we better talk about it!” Heh.
But my dialectical cynicism is no match for your allegorical *******-ism: “Ah, but we create meaning! The lonely abyss of individual experience, when shared, isn’t so lonely anymore— Mon Dieu! This tea tastes like sunshine!”
I can’t avoid a sigh-and-eye-roll combo. When my eyes return to the table, I see my upside-down reflection in a dessert spoon.
I painted a *******-esque piece in 9th grade. My art teacher adjusted her cat-eye glasses, the gold parts of her hazel irises sparkling behind them while she said something about the creative subconscious. The first drip took some self-convincing; the blank canvas on the floor seemed to taunt me with the possibility of mistake. At first I pretended I was ******* himself, trying to think the elevated nonsense he may have thought. It didn’t work. My friend told me to “just go for it,” so I did. I began with green for no reason at all, and ended with yellow for reasons that I knew existed but that I couldn’t explain. Elated, I realized my painting made sense to me.
“Would you like a sip?” I can’t avoid a smile because ****, this tea does taste like sunshine.