Life is confusing and hard and I don’t know what I’m doing. I want someone to be there so I don’t have to feel like this every ******* night when I’m alone. Yes, I have friends and family but that isn’t the same as having someone there-there, Holding you, It’s different when it’s romance. You don’t stay up late because you’re sad and alone… you stay up because talking to them is better than sleep. I know that I have problems. I can’t keep people around too long. I can’t help it. I just never had someone that pulls me back. That doesn’t let me push them away. It’s not that I am desperate. It’s not that I HAVE to have someone in my life. I just can’t keep telling myself it’s going to be okay. I’m a ****** liar.