I’m done with nights like these
With the drinking and
The drugs and the boys
I tell myself for the fourth time this year.
Maybe I just won’t go out anymore,
No more drinking and maybe,
Just maybe I can keep my pants on
Around some dude I’ve just met.
Make a more attainable goal
My friends who’ve the gossip say,
I’m not that kind of girl
I tell myself for the fifth time,
The kind who leaves love at the door
When she picks up the bottle
I have feelings and a heart.
I fall in love with my drunken regrets
Because they call me beautiful
And accept me for who I am.
This isn’t me
I say for the sixth time,
“What’s your name again?”
I ask after it’s over
But maybe it’s a little more me
Than I’d like to admit.