If an extensive amount of sadness can create sickness,
then I am on my death bed.
At 7 in the evening,
It creeps up on me when I wish for my thoughts to be most at rest.
My legs and arms are numb.
They only make movements when my entire body begins to ache from one laying position.
My stomach suffers from an obsessive frenzy,
And I begin to believe
that my body is more focused on bringing me pain
than it is working against the pain.
At this point I don't mind.
My eyes are swollen shut from the lack of tears yet
heavy from the lack of dryness.
I have become vulnerable to my demons.
Because sadness can cause sickness and I am on my death bed,
and I don't care how long I go on without food for the mind
and food for the heart.
Because I am on my death bed.