If you asked me,
"How are you?"
I wouldn't know how to answer.

                                I am everything.

Every human emotion runs through
my body all the time,
and they fluctuate even faster.
One second I can be the happiest I've
been in awhile,
and the next,
terribly angry,
or depressingly sad.

I do not blame these crazy feelings
on anyone,
other than myself.

My boyfriend is exceptional at always
keeping a smile on my face,
but even in his presence I can still not be okay.

Each day is a struggle,
to keep trying,
fighting,
sleeping,
working,
not pulling,
smiling.

     Sometimes I wonder if I will ever wake up
       and feel like everything is okay.