i answer the phone
after i let it ring a couple times
so i don't seem needy
'get dressed. we're going to a party'
you swoop me up
it already smells hazy
we pick up a couple *******
i don't remember their names
tonight,
everything changes

let's forget all the reasons
why we shouldn't be together.
lets forget about that *****
that said she 'didn't know
you were into white girls'
and how you knew
you would hear that comment more than once

forget that my house is two stories
and you barely have one to call home
i live with my parents
but yours are forgotten
among the blunts and the ashes
that we found love from

broken glass cigarette ash
i pretend not to notice
that this room is packed
and everyone here is…
black.

i pretended it didn't bother me
that you grabbed another girl
and started dancing with her
i said that i wasn't drunk enough
to dance like a stripper

when in reality i felt
like it wasn't my place
this wasn't my place
like i needed to apologize
for just showing my face
like what is the white girl doing here?
don't you have a taylor swift concert to go to?
she can be the coat rack,
hold my purse while I dance

i'm sorry i can't be what you want
but its crowded body to body
sweaty window to wall
i need to get out
blinded by the darkness
searching for silence
i just want to be next to you
be your girl outside the bedroom

i know our skin is the same with the lights off
but we've been living in the dark for far too long
i'm not a snow bunny, i'm a human being
it's not a fetish
it's a feeling

i'm sorry i can't impress your friends,
i'm sorry I'm not like them
but I'm trying
and its packed sweaty body to body
i don't recognize the music playing
drinks slinging
ears ringing
head spinning
i dip out

crowds of people swarm around
i walk away,
you call my name
i hear the sounds
bang two shots, we scream
bang four shots, i duck
bang six shots, no sounds
the lot is empty

i can't find you,
these red and blue lights are blinding
why did you take me here?
you say you're sorry
and i still don't know what to think
i love you
and you say you wish i didn't have to see
this part of your life
even though i wanted yours to be mine
ours

in fast food restaurants people would tell us
how cool it was to see an interracial couple
two lives so different
i loved the idea
that we could still become one
i loved the idea
we could freestyle in your backseat
and no one would make fun of me

you dipped out faster than you could take me to prom
i didn't know if it was because you lost feelings
or if you were worried that i would be too embarrassing
that i couldn't hang unless i was prepared to duck
too many kids afraid for their life
at least one of them needs a gun

i can still hear the shots ringing
like all all of the possibilities
everything we could have been
everything you could be now
but a friend in my algebra class
said they saw you bagging groceries

but you came to my slam the other day
wearing the hat
i brought you back from cali
eyes as red as the blood
splattered on the street