i can't even express my extreme hate for myself properly without crying during the start of it, my words get shaky and stupid, eyes start to sting, that ****** feeling in your throat, and more hatred swarming through my veins and out of my silent screams and as i stare at the ugly tears i shed that have fallen on my pillow, more hatred pierces my toungue and makes my appetite bitter with only satisfaction coming with an empty tummy and a deep cutted wrist.