I wish I didn't see.
That hollowed tangible emotion emanating from them.
the missing link that we're all feeling.
I wish I could un-see what I've seen.
I want to destroy what I know,
remember, and can't forget.
My mind replays the images.
my whole being drives me towards anger.

I wish I could let it go.

It'll hurt, to forget.
Forgetting feels like an omission of truth.
I'm an all of nothing kind of girl.
all or nothing…
So I won't forget, and I can't forget it.
It hurts, but it's the sweet bearable pain of truth.
It's the cross borne by those with eyes wide open.
My eyes are…..wide…open.
I can't stop seeing, and feeling that hurt, pain, and suffering.

I wish I could pretend it wasn't there better.
I can't
My eyes are too open.
I can't un-see it. I can't get rid of it.
I can't release.
Dear god…If only I could believe in something else.
If only I could believe in the good as much as I know and trust the bad.
I don't.
I won't forget because the bad things are more real and raw. Their truth tangible and cutting to the quick.
and I just have to see it all with eyes wide open.