She draws Crayola green meadows in which she frolics and laughs snuggling up to her imaginary daddy whom she colors in unstraight multi-hued stripes accessorized by a large unselfish heart in brick red proudly erupting from his chest. Her sepia brown-blob puppy is rediculously happy, just like her holding the perfect father she has always dreamed he is. Together they stare at blue construction paper skies and cotton ball clouds discovering sailing ships, famous people heads, and all the animals they will see on the day he comes to take her to the zoo.
~
He labors intently within the lines coloring subdivided spaces in one direction just the way he would teach her if she were here. Pressing into the bold outline on a tiger tail he hears her giggle in his thoughts.
He closes the book each page fully given life placing it on the teetering pile of earlier masterpieces filed beside his desk where he and his daughter stored the art they created on regular dates they never had. He rises on the ritual of completion toward his omnipresent closet full of stacked and redundant "if onlys", each one shaped as a 64-count box purchased and purchased again with every book he intended to share on their next wax pencil excursion. On his toes, one more "if only" goes to the top.
He still colors.
She still dreams.
~
An Orange/Red sun drew itself out of the bleacher tiered palate and hung high betwixt her cottonball clouds 29 years from the start. Daddy holds his daughter in deep embrace while a secret artiste' paints a tiny translucent drop on her quivering cheek. The diligence of construction-paper prayers are answered in the evidence that there is no crayon for clear... it is a tear, and we are really here.
(I love you my precious girl, with every color in the box :-))